25 Reasons TFM Should Fire Steve Holt

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25 Reasons TFM Should Fire Steve Holt

Steve Holt is arguably the most hated TFM writer in history. Y’all can’t stand him. Frankly, I don’t blame you. The dude sucks. That’s why I’ve compiled a list of reason why TFM should fire him. All of the following reasons are 100% true and can be verified:

  1. Steve Holt hates Hawaiian shirts.
  2. Steve Holt snorts the Ramen seasoning powder as an aphrodisiac.
  3. Steve Holt says really bad shit about your mom. Yes, your mom.
  4. Steve Holt is a vegetarian.
  5. Steve Holt skipped dove hunting to rush the worst house on campus.
  6. Steve Holt supports the redistribution of wealth.
  7. Steve Holt once drank the juice out of a glow stick in an attempt to make his penis glow.
  8. Steve Holt wears zip-off cargo pants.
  9. Steve Holt doesn’t like guns because they’re “loud and scary.”
  10. Steve Holt dips pouches.
  11. Steve Holt only drinks light beer because he’s worried about the “empty calories.”
  12. Steve Holt thinks Darius Rucker’s version of “Wagon Wheel” is better than Old Crow Medicine Show’s.
  13. Steve Holt’s favorite pastime is collecting sand dollars.
  14. Steve Holt was the smelly kid in elementary school. He’s now the smelly kid in the office.
  15. Steve Holt pees sitting down.
  16. Steve Holt wears big horse Polo.
  17. Steve Holt buys cans of tuna just to drink the juice out of them.
  18. Steve Holt smokes Virginia Slims.
  19. Steve Holt does CrossFit.
  20. Steve Holt wears a belt with suspenders.
  21. Steve Holt thinks Kim Jong-un is an “alright guy” who’s simply “misunderstood.”
  22. Steve Holt’s favorite magazine is Rolling Stone.
  23. Steve Holt talks shit about you to your girlfriend.
  24. Steve Holt thinks Blue Moon is a craft beer.
  25. Steve Holt likes list articles.

If those reasons don’t convince you that Steve Holt needs to be fired, then maybe his Facebook profile will. Dude is weird as shit.

Image via YouTube

BlutarskyTFM (@BlutoGrandex) is a contributing writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems, the self-appointed Senior Military Analyst for TFM News, founder of the #YesAllMenWhoWearHawaiianShirts Movement, and, on an unrelated note, a huge fan of buffets. While by no means an athletic man, he was the four-square champion of his elementary school in 1997. When not writing poorly organized columns or cracking stupid, inappropriate jokes on Twitter, Bluto pretends to be well-read, finds excuses not to exercise, and actually has a real job.

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