6 Reasons To Date An In-Shape Girl

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6. Wide Array Of (Cheap) Date Options

Doing the same things, night after night, with ordinary girls gets stale in a hurry. Even in your late teens and early 20s, putting on the same faded pair of comfortable, stretchy khakis and stuffing your face at the same restaurant, just to go home and grunt and slap guts to three minutes of pathetic, out-of-shape sex runs its course.

Once you start dating a fit girl, your choices for a night together explode. Anything physical or outdoorsy is now on the table. A trip to your family’s camp is much cheaper than a night of drinking doubles and calling Ubers. Would you ever even consider a night swim to complement a couple gin martinis, all culminating in a graceful, 15-minute romp in the sheets for a date night with your last girl? Hell no. Not if she just got off work/done with class and wanted to chase left over pasta with ice cream while you two spoon on the couch. You can’t waste the best Fridays of your life semi-sober on the couch.

5. They Sometimes Understand Sports

A consistent hookup of mine (the kind you go out with once in a while) invited me to a college football game last weekend since she understands my love for football and she wanted to see the post-game fireworks. The effort was nice, but the experience was lacking. She knew nothing about football, save for when to “bang on the seats” and paid virtually no attention to the action. Despite the pace and the energy of a college game under the lights and the solid seven at my side, live games are tough to enjoy when you’re cheering and hurling insults at the officials by yourself.

Girls committed to fitness often come from a sporty pedigree. Their dads imbued in them a passion for sports from a formative age. Who cares if they yell irrelevant things at the TV? At least they’re interested (or can feign interest) in the action.

4. They Look Great In Anything

Anything in her closet is free game. We’re not talking outfits straight out of Basic Bitch Bi-Monthly: ranging from leggings, boots, and an off-the-shoulder sweater to Norts, Nikes, and an oversized t-shirt. She rocks a refreshing variety of outfits and can drop jaws with any thread ensemble.

3. You’ll Never Get Complacent

She can choose to bang athletes on a whim, yet, she’d rather host your five-incher. Knowing that she’s a catch will keep you sharp.

You’ll want to keep your wardrobe tasteful and current — ditch the jeans and stop wearing white tennis shoes when you go out. Your bathroom will stay stocked. What kind of man doesn’t replace the hand towel or coordinate his hand soap with the seasons? Your bedroom will stay clean, otherwise she’ll bristle at the thought of taking the D-train to your dirty racecar sheets.

2. They’re Decent Gym Partners

If she can hit the gym four days a week, you have no excuse to skip. She’ll pull the covers off your ass at 8:00 a.m. and if you’re not up, she can easily go work out with her swarthy personal trainer friend. So, get your ass up and take her with you.

Unless you’re some dildo who insists on putting up a one-rep max on everything, your gym routines benefit from bringing your date if she’s likewise in shape. While you don’t need to incorporate her into your free-weight routine, she’ll push your cardio and challenge your endurance. She’ll inspire five more pull-ups, four more lunges, one more mile. Face it: You don’t want to look like a bitch in front of your girl.

1. The Best Sex Of Your Life

If she’s in good shape, she should have a voracious appetite for some boots knocking. We’re talking death by snu-snu. With an athletic girl, you can create violent bedroom art. They can contort and maintain positions only known to kama sutra and once-foretold in cave paintings. No more gasping through a couple sloppy minutes of elbow-shaking missionary.

As if the act itself wasn’t mind-blowing enough, these girls have the stamina of Seabiscuit. Ever hook up with a girl who came too early? Happens to me almost every day. But, it ends here. You won’t want to red-light on her dragstrip.

Or, maybe you do. If she truly supports your in-shapeness, she’ll appreciate that you shaved a few seconds off your best time.

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Kramer is a future Bachelorette contestant with an affinity for brown girls, who hails from the more successful side of the keystone state. He enjoys long crawls to the liquor cabinet and has only been punched in the face once. Send lovelies to kraysmash@gmail.com

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