9 Swim Trunks That Demand Respect For You To Rock This Spring

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It’s that special time of year when the weather gets warmer, the girls get tanner, and the drinks get colder. As we turn the corner toward spring, there are going to be plenty of opportunities to hit the pool, lake, river, or beach. Every man knows it’s essential to look good while participating in water activities. Fortunately, our friends at Man Outfitters are well-prepared to equip you with the most funky fresh swim trunks on the market. Below is some of the must have swimwear that you should be rocking in the coming months of glorious sunshine.

Southern Marsh Dockside Trunks

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Have you ever hopped into a body of water and had your trunks inflate with air? What a fucking buzzkill. Now that babe you were eyeing thinks you have a foopa. Well guess what, friend? These Dockside trunks have two grommets in the rear so you never have to worry about that awkward airbag inflating around your midsection again. They also have a third grommet on the utility pocket that lets water drain so you never have a pocket full of water. Fuckin’ science, man. The outer shell and interior briefs are made of EVAP poplin nylon that dries fast and stays comfortable wet or dry.

Colors: Aqua Blue (pictured), Slate, Red, Adubon Tan, Neon Coral, Stonewall Olive, Red White And Blue, Blue Stripe With Navy, and Jockey Green Stripe
Inseams: 6″
Price: $49 | Get Them Here »

Wellen Classic Pops

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These Classic Pops are perfect for any body of water. They let everyone know that you’re a simple, yet stylish Man. They’re constructed from nylon and feature an ultra-soft interior liner for maximum comfort, which basically means you’ll be smothered under a pile of insanely hot, bikini-clad strange. These classic swim shorts are made here in the USA — so you know you’re getting a fine product.

Colors: Red (pictured), Navy, and Turquoise
Inseams: 6″
Price: $68 | Get Them Here »

Reyn Spooner Jungle Escape Classic Swim Shorts

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The Jungle Escape Classics feature your classic jungle print in a full elastic waist trunk with a front drawstring. These shorts also feature quarter-top front pockets, a single back pocket with flap, inner net lining, and an inside coin pocket. You know who fucks with a man wearing swim trunks that have quarter-top front pockets, a single back pocket with flap, inner net lining, and an inside coin pocket? Nobody. That’s who. You could have anything in all those pockets, and anything is dangerous. Be dangerous.

Colors: Pale Blue (pictured), Turquoise, and Navy
Inseams: 7″
Price: $75 | Get Them Here »

Johnnie O Shorebreak Swim Shorts

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The Johnnie O Shorebreak Swim Shorts are perfect for the Man looking to stand out for the ladies this spring. With a half elastic waistband, velcro fly, mesh lining, printed canvas with embroidery stich patch, you’ll be the king of the water. And these babies are 100 percent poly microfiber. You know what that means.

Color: Royal/Mellon
Inseams: 8″
Price: $85 | Get Them Here »

Reyn Spooner Solid Malo Kai Vintage Swim Shorts

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If you’re planning on hitting the beach to catch some waves, these are the trunks for you. Designed for surfing, this vintage Hawaiian style board short has a front tie with velcro closure and drawstring. They are made from 100 percent nylon, and yes, it is acceptable to wear fucking board shorts if you’re surfing. That’s what they’re for.

Color: Azure
Inseams: 6″
Price: $75 | Get Them Here »

Wellen Scallop Swim Shorts

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The Scallop Trunks are made from 100 percent brushed polyester and feature a contrast scallop hemline and Wellen Buoy embroidery. If that doesn’t get your engine going, I don’t know what will. Slap a pair of these on, post up in the corner of the pool with a drink, and enjoy life, because you’re clearly winning.

Colors: Turquoise/Charcoal (Pictured), Coral/Silver
Inseams: 9″
Price: $72 | Get Them Here »

Johnnie O Point Break Swim Shorts

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These Point Break Swim Shorts from Johnnie O will send you on a vacation to Aruba every time you slide them on. Made of 100 percent poly microfiber, these shorts come with a half elastic waistband, velcro fly, and mesh lining. Take yourself on a tropical vacation now.

Color: Violet/Aruba
Inseams: 8″
Price: $85 | Get Them Here »

Reyn Spooner Paradise Cup Swim Shorts

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The Paradise Cup board shorts by Reyn Spooner will have you racing to the finish. Made from 100 percent soft polyester, these are stylish enough to catch the eye of the ladies, and give you plenty of comfort as you ride a wave into shore.

Colors: Red (Pictured), Surf
Inseams: 7″
Price: $75 | Get Them Here »

Reyn Spooner Beachcomber Vintage Swim Shorts

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Last — but certainly not least — are the Beachcomber Vintage shorts from Reyn Spooner. These are exactly what you would expect Tom Selleck to be rocking along with a sweet ‘stache and dual arm-floaties that are actually smoking hot women. The Beachcombers are vintage surf style swim shorts made from 100 percent nylon that have a front tie with velcro closure and drawstring, so you never have to worry about them coming off and exposing your dingaling for the whole world to see.

Color: Turquoise
Inseam: 6″
Price: $75 | Get Them Here »

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