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Looking For A Job? Absolut Vodka Is Hiring A Professional Drinker

absolut vodka taster

Think you can drink at the professional level? There may be a job opening for you.

Absolut Vodka is looking to hire a professional drinker, a “billion-dollar nose,” as they put it, to serve as the company’s official taster.

While this may seem like a dream job for some of you, it’s far more than just drinking vodka. The full-time, senior-level job focuses on tasting and evaluating vodkas, as well as creating new types of vodka. Sadly, your extensive experience sampling various $15 plastic handles of vodka may not be relevant here, so your vast knowledge of all the Burnett’s flavors probably isn’t going to help you land this job.

I’ve gone on the record numerous times saying that all vodka pretty much tastes the same (yes, there is some difference, but not much). Maybe it’s because I don’t have a “billion-dollar nose” like the retiring Absolut taster, Per Hermansson, but I stand by my assertion that the difference between top shelf vodka and bottom shelf vodka is negligible, at least to laymen like you and me. Funnel vodka that a convicted ass rapist distilled in his prison toilet down my throat or serve me a glass of Grey Goose on the rocks — I couldn’t tell you which was which. Bourbon, on the other hand, has about a mile between the good stuff and the bad.

Regardless, no matter what the spirit in question is, a job where you get paid to drink and create liquor can’t be a bad gig.

[via Nine]

Image via Shutterstock

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BlutarskyTFM

BlutarskyTFM (@BlutoGrandex) is a contributing writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems, the self-appointed Senior Military Analyst for TFM News, founder of the #YesAllMenWhoWearHawaiianShirts Movement, and, on an unrelated note, a huge fan of buffets. While by no means an athletic man, he was the four-square champion of his elementary school back in the day. When not writing poorly organized columns or cracking stupid, inappropriate jokes on Twitter, Bluto pretends to be well-read, finds excuses not to exercise, and actually has a real job.

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