Man Arrested For Getting Naked And Humping Cars In Alabama

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Nice Move

A man was arrested on Friday for stripping naked and violating vehicles outside of an Alabama restaurant. Cops say the nude car humper was “urinating on and thrusting against” several people’s rides.

From Al.com:

A Mississippi man is sitting inside a Mobile County jail after he was accused of urinating and committing lewd acts with cars in the parking lot of a Foosackly’s restaurant in Mobile on Friday (July 22) night.

The Mobile Police Department arrested 39 year-old, Patrick Earl Glydewell from Saucier, Mississippi and charged him with public lewdness and disorderly conduct in the incident.

Don’t even think about judging this man. Who or what someone chooses to have sex with is that individual’s business and no one else’s. Heterosexual. Homosexual. Motosexual. Love is love. Accept it. All the families in that restaurant should’ve just let the man be and go back to their plates of fried okra. Maybe they could’ve used it as a teaching opportunity.

“Daddy, why is that man stuffing his pee-pee in our gas tank?”

“Well son, just like I love your mother, some men love other men. Some love cars. Some even love Asians. What these people do may seem off-putting to us, but it’s important to remember that they are born that way and it is not our place to tell them how to live.”

That’s how the restaurant patrons should’ve handled the situation. Not by calling the cops. It’s 2016 for Christ’s sake. If you want, you should be free to ram a Dodge. Or play with a Viper. Or pay for a Ford Escort. Audi TT-S. Hummer.

And you know what? I totally get the whole vehicle fetish. Sometimes you just want to thank your ride for its efficient gas mileage. The way it hugs the turns. The way the sun shines off its body after a wash. Hnnnngghh.

Peeing on the cars is a little trashy, though. Must have been some real grimy hooptys up in that parking lot.

[via Al.com]

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