An Open Letter to GDIs: Yes, We’re Really Like This

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Dear GDIs,

It has come to my attention that now, more than ever, the gap between “frat” and “GDI” is widening at an exponential rate. Believe it or not, I’m not here to talk down to you or belittle you (see literally any other page on this site if that’s what you’re looking for). I’m just here to clear the air about a few things, like why we are such instruments of drunken chaos and overall damn good times, along with why we seem so different from you.

First and foremost, we get hazed. It might sound unnecessary or immature to you, but we take it very seriously and consider the pledge building process a cornerstone of our respective houses. You might have heard stories of thumbs up asses, or bows-and-toes over broken glass, but I’m here to tell you that’s not what it’s about (and I assure you, most chapters aren’t that fucked up anyways). The simple fact is that each and every one of us comes out of high school cracked out on a senior year superiority complex, and a little hazing serves an excellent purpose: putting us in line. With a powerful breaking down and consequent building up of our egos, you diminish the severely misguided “I’m hot shit as a freshman” syndrome. By no means am I suggesting that all GDIs carry this tag, but without a proper guided growing process your freshman year, you miss out on a lot. I’m not saying you were a shitty person in high school. I’m just trying to point out that constant self-improvement is something to strive for in life, and Greek life offers an excellent opportunity to do just that.

Second of all: we party. I know what you might be thinking. “We party too brah!” No, you don’t. Unless you can somehow match a hundred people throwing thousands of dollars a year solely for the sake of debauchery, you can’t even begin to compare. Our gamedays consist of trying to decide which band should play at our afterparty, and if 9 pallets will be enough beer. Yours are spent trying to figure out which parking lot to party in, and picking up an 18 of Heineken. Once again, not trying to belittle you, but the simple fact is you can not possibly consider yourself 1/1000th of our level in the realm of raging. We have more money, more friends, more girls, and more booze. Starting to regret your decision not to rush? I would too.

Finally, and (arguably) most important, we have the women. While there are plenty of hot GDI babes scattered across campuses (believe it or not), there is simply no comparison to a sorority woman. In much the same way as pledging builds us into men, girls involved in the sorority process grow and learn and better themselves throughout. The result? Some of the classiest women on campus. Say what you want about sorority girls being bitchy (in my experience all women are), but you can’t tell me that a GDI could possibly be superior to a gorgeous, polite Southern Belle who makes one hell of a sandwich.

In conclusion, my GDI friends, there is a reason we act the way we do. We may seem like caricatures of the college experience: partying daily to the point of blackout, accepting any dare no matter the risk (“You won’t fuck that chick on top of the administration building!”), and boasting about our father’s trust funds on a regular basis. I’m here to tell you…we’re not faking it. We are really like this, and you really are missing out.

Regards,

StuffFratPeopleLike

StuffFratPeopleLike

StuffFratPeopleLike (@StuffFratsLike) is a writer for Total Frat Move, and due to his crippling OCD and functional alcoholism he can only understand and write text when presented in a numbered list format. So you're all jerks for calling him out on it. He is a self described Huguenot, and commands a secret sexual fetish for angry internet comments. All shameless praise can be directed to: joe@grandex.co

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  1. 1
    hazingisfun

    “No, you don’t.”

    That basically sums it up. It takes being in a Fraternity to really appreciate the difference. Any geed who thinks he is having a great college experience is sadly mistaken.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 3 years ago
  2. 1
    Bromethious

    As I read this article sipping on my Old Fashion I look at my first semester friends who “Just didn’t have what it takes”… thank god they didn’t. There is a reason we are just better.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 3 years ago

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