At The Bars And In Your Professional Life, Fake It ‘Til You Make It

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Fake It Till You Make It

Most of the articles I write for this website, while amusing, amount to little more than intricately crafted boner jokes, obscure movie references, and stories about the times I almost had sex. This one, however, is different. This article is a short and simple piece of advice that, if heeded, will improve your life more than McDonald’s all day breakfast; rather than sit around waiting for a chance to gain experience and, through that, gain confidence, skip straight to the confidence part and use that confidence to leverage more experience. In other words, act like my ex trying to orgasm and fake it ’til you make it.

The first time I noticed this phenomenon was during my early (read: virgin) years of high school. Like many kids my age, pussy was more mysterious to me than the ending of Inception. It was obvious that the key to women was confidence, but I didn’t understand how I could be confident without having any basis for confidence. It all seemed like a vicious cycle to me, until, with some help from my good buddy Jack Daniels, I realized that I needed to just act like I knew what I was doing and let the bullshit fall where it may. It may seem like a small realization, but for me it was a fundamental shift in the way I viewed the opposite sex, and was the first step towards me becoming the champion of sexually disappointing women.

This fake it ’til you make it strategy applies to more than just hook ups, too. From a professional standpoint, the interview process is entirely predicated upon having confidence you can do something you’ve never done before. If you can present yourself as confident and capable, it provides you the opportunity to gain the experience that will actually make you confident and capable. Furthermore, if you continually tell yourself that you are the man for the job, eventually you will believe it. It’s like that self-help book The Secret, but for normal people with a shot at a successful career and lifelong happiness.

At first it seemed crazy to me that such a simple change in thought process could have such a profound effect, but then I thought back to a few other guys who acted like they knew what they were doing before they actually did: our founding fathers. Washington was a retired British officer, Jefferson a lawyer. Hell, Ben Franklin was better known for flying a kite and fucking hookers than his failed attempt at unifying the colonies before The Albany Plan of Union of 1754. None of these men had any reason to believe that they could lead a successful revolution against the most dominant empire of the era, yet they confidently declared that their cause was worth fighting for and managed to create the best country that the world has ever known.

So next time you’re talking to a girl at a bar or interviewing for an internship, do what our nation’s heroes did and fake it ’til you make it.

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