Auburn Football Is Desperate To Sell Tickets, Turns To Groupon

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Nice Move

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In life, there are no moral victories; only scoreboards. Auburn’s scoreboard, both on and off the field, outlook does not look good. On the heels of another embarrassing loss to the former Mr. Sadie Robertson, Trevor Knight, and Texas A&M at home, Auburn football and their beleaguered sweater vest wearing coach Gus Malzahn have turned to a new level of desperation: selling tickets to their home finale on discount service Groupon.

Yes, I did just say Groupon.

Somehow Malzahn and the marketing team found time, in between packing the moving trucks and listing their homes for sale, to come up with such a patently ingenious idea. Now, as the SEC continues to clobber the bizarrely hapless Tigers, fans have the silver lining of a Sunday morning price cut to ease the pain of another home field humiliation.

This, without a doubt, serves as an ominous reminder for Malzahn & Co. of the scorching seat the one-time wonder kid offensive coordinator finds himself on in 2016. The Tigers have already lost twice, looking in a state of general malaise against what is likely not a great Aggie team in front of their own crowd.

The gap between Auburn and arch rival Alabama continues to widen, after reigniting what was likely the most competitive major college football rivalry from the arrival of Cam Newton to the kick six Iron Bowl miracle. But, as is life as a college football coach, things change quickly.

Something tells me the Crimson Tide won’t be offering Groupons for this year’s Iron Bowl when they blow the Tigers back to irrelevance.

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