Using your beer bottle as you would your index finger to point something out. TFM.
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Having to move a collection of beer bongs and drug paraphernalia to get to the First-aid kit. TFM.
Saying, “I’m a lover, not a fighter,” despite being subpar at both. TFM.
Quickly changing the subject when asked by your parents to explain the origin of your nickname. TFM.
Steve Spurrier hitting the gym in a vest and polo. TFM.
Making an unconscious effort. TFM.
Churchill Downs banning selfie sticks during the Derby. TFM.
4/20 haze it. TFM.
Giving yourself a gimme on a putt you’re too intoxicated to sink. TFM.
Comparing your return to class to the return of Derrick Rose. TFM.
Waking up with a new nickname and no recollection of how you earned it. TFM.
Suddenly possessing a law degree while being questioned by university police. TFM.
60% of the pledges in attendance at the anti-hazing presentation having mustaches. TFM.
Clark Griswold introducing himself abroad as “Clark Griswold, United States of America.” TFM.
Getting the phone number right, but her name wrong. TFM.
The faint smell of beer stained floors being a friendly reminder that you’re home. TFM.
Having well-conditioned pledges, yet not letting them actually play intramurals. TFM.
Bragging that you “don’t even really work out that much” after taking off your shirt to reveal a very pitiful physique. TFM.
Asking your very recently divorced professor to formal. TFM.
“I was in PCB” being your only defense in court. TFM.