420 Days of FAIL FRIDAY
After 420 days (ironically on 4/20) I decided it was time to create a database for all this hilarity. Here is every FAIL FRIDAY ever… 420 days ago: The FIRST Fail Friday 413 days ago: Some People Just Don’t Get It 406 days ago: Seriously? Come on. 399 days ago: The Never Ending Stream of...
30 Excuses to Get Drunk
1. Obama (hopefully) only has 274 days left in office. 2. Finals week is coming up, and you can’t (shouldn’t) get drunk in the library. 3. Because almost everything in the world is more fun when you’re drunk. 4. It’s Monday, and another shitty week of school just started. 5. It’s Tuesday, and you’re still...
The President’s Club
“Welcome to the President’s Club. This is our third meeting, so by now you should be pretty familiar with the process. Remember to honor Robert’s Rules of Order…the IFC President has the floor,” the Greek Life coordinator announces to the to the impatient, distracted presidents gathered before him. This is your bi-weekly meeting of the...
420 Philosophy
It’s that magical time of year again when people from all around the world get blazed together at the same glorious time. It’s 420 and if you don’t know what the hype is all about you probably won’t be ripping Mr. Geebs today. 420 is about celebrating life. It’s about experiencing unity with fellow human...
FAIL FRIDAY: Who Cares? You’re All Stoned
Ten real submissions, ten photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty. Fckued a gril wtih dyslexia, she saw the tatotoo on my dcik and aksed waht TMF maent. TFM.-Washington It’s cute when two special people with learning disabilities get together. I’m going to name my firstborn...
The Dapper Dipper on Dating
For the most part, people in college and especially the Greek world have pretty skewed expectations of what dating actually means. Maybe it’s the culture of sorority girls trying to find Mr. Right competing with fraternity guys behaving like…well, fraternity guys. Either way, people have all of these lofty expectations of what college dating is...
High School Frat Prospects
Note: The following characters are fictional. Clayton Hodge Height: 5’10” Weight: 190 lbs. High School: Beaumont Kelly – Beaumont, TX GPA: 2.9 Strengths: - dedicated alcoholic - can bong two beers in 5 seconds flat - father is successful lawyer - seasoned crawfish boiler - doesn’t believe in monogamy - smooth talker, regularly outkicks coverage...
Some People You’ll Meet at a House Party
It seems that no matter where you go for a house party, there are certain things you can’t escape. Whether you’re looking for an evening to kick back and relax or are drunkenly stumbling in after what’s already been an eventful night, from the moment you walk in you’re bound to meet a few of...
40 Things GDIs Should Know About Greeks
1. We are going to take up the whole sidewalk when we walk to class. Longboard accordingly. 2. We’re too hungover to give a shit about your pamphlet, don’t try to hand one to us. 3. There’s a bike lane. Use it. 4. We don’t pay for our friends, we pay to not have to...
America: The Big Swinging Dick of the World. Part Deux.
America is the greatest country on Earth for many reasons. Democracy, freedom, sandwiches, sluts… but ultimately it comes down to the fact that we are the best at making other people dead. If life is a game, you can’t win it if you aren’t alive. That is the simple philosophy that fuels the badassery of...
Gentlemen, Your Officer Candidates
Brothers, It is April, and I think everyone knows what that means. Sundress season? Good point, but not what I was referring to. Seersucker season? I don’t play by those rules. I was wearing seersucker in a snowball fight months ago. Spring season for hunting for turkey? Yes, that too. Fuck it, I’ll just tell...
TFM Spring Break Photo Contest Results
After weeks of fierce competition the TFM Spring Break Photo Contest has come to a close. I’d like to thank everyone that participated. Some seriously disturbing images were submitted that will permanently haunt my dreams. Here are some of the best photos from the contest, some of the worst fails that were submitted, and finally…the...
Reasons to Day Rage
The last time I day partied with the TFM staff, I ruined the clothes I was wearing, convinced a middle-aged couple at the bar to get divorced, and drank myself mute. And that was a spontaneous 5-person Sunday outing to a local hole in the wall. We just do things the right way is all...
50 Things Sorority Girls Should Know About Fraternity Guys
1. We don’t like your Lilly Pulitzer, we tolerate it. 2. We don’t want to hear about your period. At all. 3. There are very few things you can do that are better than a morning blowjob. 4. If you’re giving us head, for the love of God don’t remind us of the fact that...
Missing the Pre Game Rub
“My mother caught me…you know, I was alone…” And just like that, George Costanza kicked off the longest 40 days and 40 nights of my life. Flashback to Ash Wednesday. I still hadn’t come up with what I was going to give up for Lent. I’m lying in bed, cross on my forehead, hand on...
FAIL FRIDAY: We Are Young
Ten real submissions, ten photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty. Tackling your little cousin in a family flag football game just so you can grab her tight ass. TFM.-Texas Come on man. Really? Asking a girl if she’s ever had sex with a millionaire. After...
Ally’s Poolside Photoshoot
Tucson12 continues their search for the hottest girl at The University of Arizona. Next up Ally Redig: She wants to be what kind of doctor? For more of Ally or more Arizona girls visit Tucson12.com
Throwback Thursday: Hazed and Confused
With all the hazing in the news lately we figured that we’d get topical with our Throwback Thursday and relive some of the greatest moments of the classic summer movie “Dazed and Confused.” If you aren’t familiar with the movie then let me give you a quick synopsis I’m not going to explain it to...
Bobby Petrino is Just Misunderstood
This has been a tough week for all of us. I remember the day I found out like it was yesterday. I was spraying mud all over the underside of my roommate’s toilet seat, and all of a sudden I hear Linda Cohn’s stupid fucking voice saying that Bobby had been involved in a motorcycle...
The Champ on Entitlement
You probably think you know where this is going. You’re wrong. No this isn’t about Occupy Wall Street or destroying liberal agendas or any of that crap. This is a real issue that bugs me and has ever since I graduated. There are a lot of kids who scrap and claw their way through college....
