Party Tanks from Rowdy Gentleman
The Back to Back World War Champs Party Tank and more at RowdyGentleman.com
Shop Now »
Real Frat Tales: Duke, the Suicidal Frathound
Ah, the frathound. More than just man’s best friend, he’s been adopted and fully integrated into the fraternity culture. Posting up on front porches, fishing for dimes, afternoon dove hunts, he does it all. And unlike slapdick pledges, you can always count on him. Looking down from the hierarchy of respect, the frathound sees pledges,...
- Nice Move 138
- Comments 84
- Texas
Cops are Here
Scene: house in a small West Texas town ”So, we’re at this girl’s house. Her parents were out of town, so we decided to throw a little get-together. We’re talking probably 75 people, kegs, pot, and a slew of firm B-cups. You know, your typical house party. We’re all sitting around pounding Stones and whatnot,...
- Nice Move 108
- Comments 85
- Texas
Frattest Nickelodeon Characters of the 90′s
Odds are that if you’re visiting this website you grew up in the 1990s, AKA the greatest decade ever. Living as a child of the 90’s you had things like Goldeneye 64, the Mighty Ducks trilogy, Space Jam and Nickelodeon in the afternoon. Seeing as TV helped raise us as much as any parent, maid,...
- Nice Move 269
- Comments 150
- Missouri
Bolt/Walkout: A Pledge’s Ultimate “Fuck You”
One of the many things that bond so many of us fraternity men are our stories. There are certain moments during your time in college that stand out. For me, most of those memorable moments came during pledgeship, if only because that is the only time in college when someone actually puts restraints on when...
- Nice Move 123
- Comments 52
- Missouri
Some People You’ll Meet at a House Party
It seems that no matter where you go for a house party, there are certain things you can’t escape. Whether you’re looking for an evening to kick back and relax or are drunkenly stumbling in after what’s already been an eventful night, from the moment you walk in you’re bound to meet a few of...
- Nice Move 108
- Comments 77
- Indiana
Late Round Frat Sleepers
America loves a great underdog story – the Miracle on Ice, Drew Brees coming back from a shredded shoulder to win a Super Bowl, Rudy Ruettiger earning a spot on the Notre Dame football roster, and of course little Squints Palledorous knocking boots with town dime, Wendy Peffercorn. Perhaps the most notable underdog story of...
- Nice Move 105
- Comments 62
- Texas
Throwback Thursday: Divorce Between Conservatives and Liberals
Here’s an old chain email outlining a “divorce agreement” between the Conservatives and Liberals in the United States. It sounds pretty fair. DIVORCE AGREEMENT Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al: We have stuck together since the late 1950′s for the sake of the kids, but the whole of...
- Nice Move 278
- Comments 68
- Illinois
Top 10 Frattest MLB Players
10. Mickey Mantle Mickey Mantle kicks off this list for being perhaps the highest functioning alcoholic this country has ever seen. While playing drunk, Mickey amassed the following throughout his career: 536 homeruns as a switch hitter, 3 league MVPs, and 7 World Series rings. And he played a great centerfield for the Yankees. The...
- Nice Move 196
- Comments 99
- Texas
Golden Tee: A Frat House Must
The Golden Tee follow-through. Those familiar with the game can picture it now. It’s an artful, picturesque motion recognized in bars, restaurants and fraternity houses alike. The thud of a palm to the trackball. The hand thrust toward the screen and the leg-off-the-floor follow-through are some customary traits of this virtual golf art form. The...
- Nice Move 63
- Comments 49
- Texas
Typical Fraternity/Sorority Sexual Interaction
After having attended a date function together (which you can read about here), a fraternity gentleman and a sorority lady head home to end their night. The following is the scenario in which…well, in which they do it. Their thoughts are in italics, and the conversation is in plain text. Him: Okay, so I finally...
- Nice Move 419
- Comments 93
- Anonymous
Throwback Thursday: The Life and Times of Cash McMogulson
Several years ago The Legend of Cash McMogulson first appeared on a MySpace blog and quickly made its way around the internet and thru office emails. On this Throwback Thursday we salute Cash McMogulson, the man who has been taring up the Dallas post-grad scene for the better part of the 21st century. My name...
- Nice Move 51
- Comments 58
- Texas
Humans vs. Zombies VS. Everyone Else
In their quest to fill the countless hours left in their days by their lack of social lives, GDIs have found yet another solution to simultaneously entertain themselves and embarrass everyone else around them: Humans vs. Zombies. The name might sound like a B-rated horror flick, but we couldn’t be quite that lucky. For those...
- Nice Move 65
- Comments 64
- Arkansas
The Four Levels of Collegiate Sickness
Close living quarters. Tens of thousands of your closest friends. The extremely questionable hygiene habits of many geeds and campus food workers. Yes, the American college experience can be a fairly unhealthy place and unless you’re a psycho germaphobe who lubricates his self love sessions with Purell, you’re going to get sick at some point....
- Nice Move 74
- Comments 51
- Florida
50 Ways To Stay Frat This Summer
1. Float trip. 2. Make your little brother your own personal pledge. 3. Get kicked out of a hometown bar by a former high school classmate. 4. Road trip to a city you’ve never been, drink to excess, make that city wish you never came. 5. Catch up on old Clint Eastwood and John Wayne...
- Nice Move 154
- Comments 149
- Missouri
More Guys in Every Fraternity
I’m back, mother fuckers, and just because so many of you had a problem with the length of the last “Guys in Every Fraternity” installment (147 comments of bitching, well done guys), I’ve decided to grace you with five more fraternal personalities that we all know just a little too well. Mr. Adderall This brother...
- Nice Move 124
- Comments 52
- Florida
Throwback Thursday: The One Fingered Victory Salute
Without a doubt, George W. was one of the most memorable personalities that will ever occupy the White House. His southern swagger and disregard for grammatical perfection consistently made him an enjoyable speaker. He's given us many entertaining moments throughout his career, including the famous "one fingered victory salute."
- Nice Move 61
- Comments 30
- Texas
Drug User Guide
Adderall, Mr. Study Buddy Adderall is the only reason that stupid people graduate from college. Adderall allows you to cram weeks of course work into a few nights of binge reading. If you’re lucky enough to have a prescription that your parents pay for, you can just sell it during exam week. Adderall is like...
- Nice Move 157
- Comments 98
- Florida
Fratstars vs. Flatbills: It’s A War. Sterling Cooper Reports
Unbeknownst to many of you, I have been spending my recent months in a war-zone. When I am not working as a congressional lobbyist for whiskey distillers or in my position as the United States’ ambassador to the Republic of Texas, I am operating as a field correspondent in one of the most dangerous battlefields in the country…the party scene.
- Nice Move 311
- Comments 207
- Texas
The Champ on Wedding Season
It’s May, the primetime of wedding season is here. For postgrads it’s the best time of year. That’s right, watching some poor schlub get hitched up to his high school sweetheart makes for a great weekend. You know the girl, the one that made him come home that one Thursday night and the pledge trainer...
- Nice Move 117
- Comments 37
- Missouri
First Round Frat Busts
We’re a couple days away from the 2012 NFL Draft. And I’m sure it will be real exciting. But look, if you want real draft talk, meander your ass over to ESPN. That NFL draft show where McShay and Kiper go at each other about who has the best pre-shower towel whip form or who...
- Nice Move 90
- Comments 61
- Texas
REAL FRAT MOVES
Awwww fuck y’all, looks like some bitches up at Texas A&M decided to throw down. (as Bluto) “INTERNET FIGHT!!!!!” This article, posted on the Texas A&M Department of Greek Life Tumblr (I prefer my Tumblrs to have cat memes personally) decided to repost this blog written over the summer by a gentleman (seriously, this bro is...
50 Things I Learned in College
1. There is always an excuse to get drunk. 2. Biting a stripper’s nipple is frowned upon. 3. Sometimes you just have to puke and rally. 4. You can’t get into an Obama rally wearing camo and McCain/Palin “Drill Baby Drill” t-shirts. 5. If everyone hates the girl you’re talking to, it’s time to re-evaluate...
- Nice Move 948
- Comments 88
- Florida
FAIL FRIDAY: Shit GDIs Say
Ten real submissions, four photos, and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty. Jerking off at red lights. TFM.–Georgia Did you go to Drivers Ed with Pee-wee Herman? Chicks are all into vampires these days, so when I go out I put fang caps on my teeth and...
- Nice Move 60
- Comments 119
- Anonymous
A GDI’s Life Mission to End Greek Life
The following letter was allegedly sent to the sorority presidents at LSU earlier this week: To whom it may concern: I have been posting on the Reveille’s Web site under the guise of “Josh Robertson” for some time. I even wrote a letter to the editor which was published, citing me as a student in...
- Nice Move 63
- Comments 215
- Texas
FAIL FRIDAY: Who Cares? You’re All Stoned
Ten real submissions, ten photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty. Fckued a gril wtih dyslexia, she saw the tatotoo on my dcik and aksed waht TMF maent. TFM.-Washington It’s cute when two special people with learning disabilities get together. I’m going to name my firstborn...
- Nice Move 42
- Comments 164
- Anonymous
FAIL FRIDAY: Running With Scissors
Ten real submissions, five photos, and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty. Being gay but still having slampieces to keep up appearances. TFM.-South Carolina Tom Cruise frat. Sometimes I draw a penis on my face before I go out so people know I’m there to fucking party....
- Nice Move 54
- Comments 170
- Anonymous
Throwback Thursday: Ms. South Carolina Draws a Blank, Plays It Anyway
In 2007 during the Miss Teen USA pageant, Ms. South Carolina- Caitlin Upton, dropped an epic bomb. Women across the country were forced to retreat to their kitchens...
- Nice Move 31
- Comments 42
- Florida
Aggressively Celebrating Christmas
Happy Holidays? Fuck that shit. Merry Christmas motherfuckers! Christmas is my favorite holiday of the year. Why? I don’t really know. Maybe it’s because I like presents. Maybe it’s because I love the atmosphere, or because the soundtrack to “A Charlie Brown Christmas” was playing in the background when I lost my virginity. Full disclosure,...
- Nice Move 305
- Comments 69
- Missouri
FAIL COLUMN: I am an Asshole. The Fun Bags Story.
Every week the TFM editorial staff receives a number of column submissions that, to put it mildly, read like the musings of a drunken lunatic. Here, without a single edit, is one of those columns in its entirety. As with Fail Friday, the name of the author has been omitted to protect the guilty. Intern,...
- Nice Move 78
- Comments 54
- Anonymous
Hell Week: The Long Par 5 on 18
There are fraternities who initiate their pledges in November nowadays, and hey, that’s just great. But most of us post-grad guys had to do it the old-fashioned way (yes, this is one of those “you have it easier than I did” posts). Sixteen weeks of pledgeship, followed by one week of pure, shit-your-pants, want-to-call-your-mommy-but-you-can’t-because-we-took-away-your-cell-phone, horror....
