Damn, It Feels Good To Be A Pledge, Sir!

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Damn, It Feels Good To Be A Pledge, Sir!

The Geto Boys “Damn, It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta” always fires me up before the pledges come over. I decided that it’s only fair that the pledges got an anthem of their own to sing during bonding activities. It really boosts morale. Feel free to borrow.

Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!

Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!
A real pledge in the hazement never sees daylight
A real pledge in the hazement never runs his mouth
‘Cause real pledges in the hazement say nothin’ right
And pledges always gotta keep our eyes down
Remind us that our place is at the bottom
But real pledges in the hazement don’t talk much
‘Cause real pledges in the hazement are always moppin’
And everything’s happy in the mind of a pledge
‘Cause all pledges think about is Hell Week
Doing down-ups 365, ‘bows ‘n toes 24/7
‘Cause real pledges in the hazement don’t sleep

And all I gotta say to you
Bros in control, paddle-swingin’, stingin’ brothers
“When the blackball drops, what we gonna do?”
Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!

Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!
Cleaning the house instead of studying for class
Although I coulda been on the Dean’s list
Now I’m gonna have to cheat just to pass
Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!
If I die from wall sits, who will even know?
Calisthenics all night as the risk manager’s drunkenly singing
“Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes”
Now pledges in the hazement got bids for all sorts of reasons
Some had legacies in the past
But this pledge here was a dumdum
Rushed my cousin’s house who now steals my cash.

Now all I gotta say to you
Bros in control, diss-slingin’, Wagon Wheel-singin’ brothers
“When fifth years get back from the bar, what we gonna do?”
Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!

Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!
A real pledge in the hazement never knows what to say
When the brothers are demanding answers at a lineup
About which brother in the house makes the least pay
Now sororities look at pledges in the hazement like a taxi
Calling us asking for a sober ride at 3
Real pledges in the hazement don’t eat much
When we do, it’s usually near a can of trash
‘Cause the brothers made dinner and if you don’t lean over quickly
The pickled rotten eggs will come up from your stomach real fast

Maybe one day there’ll be a day I’ll say an alphabet without drinking dip spit
Or not think about how bad the paddle edge hurts
But pledges like myself don’t got time to daydream
‘Cause damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!

And now, a word from the Pledge Class President

Damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!
Getting elected to be the head goat
You’d think that’d mean that everyone respects me
But if anyone eyes a brother, it’s my fault
So every now and then I get paddled hardest
For things that I didn’t even do
Brothers will drop me off in the middle of the woods naked
With just a quarter and a pair of shoes
The Song That Never Ends is starting to kill me
The brothers restart it before it goes very far
Yes sir, I would love to do more ‘bows and toes
Even though these bottlecaps are gonna leave a scar

To my pledge master having fun when he makes us run
I’d sincerely like to thank ya,
‘Cause now I got a bowl of ice poured down my pants
And damn, it feels good to be a pledge, sir!

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