Dick-Shaped Weather Map Induces Laughter Fits From Immature News Anchors

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A dick-shaped weather map on the WGN Morning News in Chicago was enough to send a group of immature news anchors into giggle fits Wednesday morning.

Trigger Warning: Some of you might find this video to be offensive.

It’s not the first time this vile station has mocked the weather, either:

Forgive me, but I appreciated the era where serious news anchors took to our television sets and treated the viewers with respect — not a bunch of amateurish children spouting off penis puns at the drop of hat.

“I’ll say, the east coast is getting the shaft, huh?”

“They call that a rod of high pressure.”

And those sound effects? Come on. You don’t see the professionals over at NBC 5 or ABC 7 dragging their viewers through the perverted minds of their anchors. You know why? Because children watch the weather during the summer so they can plan afternoons full of slip ‘n slides and whiffle ball games, and it is our duty to spare the children.

As some of you may know, this story clearly hits home for me. My grandfather was a weatherman in early 20th century Poland before he hopped on a boat and came to America to give his a family a new life — a better life. He spent the rest of his years as a coal miner in the Appalachians, trying to provide for my father and his 12 brothers and sisters. They still tell the tales of my grandfather at the mines — how he saved his small West Virginia town from a dangerous flood after correctly predicting an incoming thunderstorm hours before it washed away Main Street. I know he is looking down from news anchor heaven on this new era of weathermen with such disdain and contempt.

Shame on you, WGN. I won’t be content until someone loses a job over this debacle. The weather must be treated with integrity. If it isn’t, what is the point of watching the news anymore?

[via WGN]


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