Drunk Woman Fucks Lawn Chairs, Pisses On Grass, Flashes Vagina And Ass As Family Looks On In Horror

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Nice Move

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There goes the neighborhood.

What a scene that must have been. One minute you’re sitting in the living room with the family on a quiet Monday evening, the house is filled with the pleasant aroma of dinner cooking on the stove, and your favorite TV show is on. You’re helping Junior with his math homework and your teenage daughter is on the couch texting 100 words a minute and ignoring the family, then you sense a commotion out on the lawn so you all scurry over to the window to see what’s going on, and BOOM–the whole fam catches a 33-year-old beav shot straight to the face.

You know it’s your responsibility to get the kids away from the window, but the crazy, drunk woman suddenly hikes up her skirt and steals the virginity of the lawn chairs you got for Father’s Day, and you just can’t stop looking on in bewilderment and arousal. Junior grows up real quick.

As a final sendoff, the insane woman fires an ass-beav combo shot straight to Junior’s virgin eyeballs and pisses her initials into your freshly cut grass before splitting the scene. You don’t know whether to clap, shield the kids’ eyes, or call the cops.

In this real-life, actual instance that occurred in Seattle last Monday, the cops were called, probably by the wife.

From Komo News:

According to police, nudity becomes criminal if it “causes a person to reasonably experience fear, alarm or concern.” That was the case on August 4 when an “extremely intoxicated” 33-year-old woman wandered into a yard in the 78000 block of Beacon Avenue South.

With several members of a family looking on in horror, police say the woman “hiked up her dress and engaged in an intimate act with several lawn chairs.”

She then began urinating on the lawn before “quite purposefully exposing her genitalia, and then posterior, to the family inside the home,” according to police.

She was arrested and booked for indecent exposure.

[via Komo News]

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