News

East Carolina University Student Busted For Stealing Over 100 Bras

The word “creepy” is thrown around a lot these days. Sometimes it’s warranted, sometimes it’s not. For example, is it “creepy” that I keep a detailed log of when all of my thousands of female friends are on their periods? No, because I only use it so that I know what time of the month to avoid them. I’ve been deathly scared of bears ever since I was forced to watch that pants-less ursine Winnie the Pooh strut his junk around as a toddler, and, as we all know, bears can smell the menstruation.

Is it “creepy” that an East Carolina student stole over 100 bras from an ECU residence hall back in September? As far as I’m concerned, that’s up for debate. East Carolina University officials don’t agree with me, however, as the student was “kicked out of the dorm and charged with theft.”

ECU just assumes that the perpetrator is some creepo beepo, stealing bras for no other reason than to fulfill some weird, sexual desire. They’re not giving this poor schmo any reasonable doubt here. I mean he lives in the dorms, so he’s probably a freshman. What if he is just looking for a little extra support after the freshman 15 went right to his moobs? I can’t blame this goober for something as innocent as wanting to shape his saggy dude lumps into a sweet rack, I just can’t.

[via The East Carolinian]

Image via Tren Kamp

***

Email this to a friend

Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a writer and content manager for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin. He has been called the "Patron Saint of Butt Stuff" despite never having engaged in sexual activity of any nature until he turned 21, which he is still convinced is the minimum age at which you can legally have sex.

21 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take TFM with you. Get

New Stories

Load More