Columns

FAIL FRIDAY: Deport The Geeds

This is a recurring TFM series. Catch up with all installments of Fail Friday by visiting the archive.

Ten real submissions, 22 photos, and three videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Donald Trump should stop trying to deport all these muslims and start deporting these geeds. TFM.

A policy we can all get behind.

Ironically, my name is Walter and unfortunately I used to fuck an old cat lady. Her cat would piss on my clothes. Her place was dirty, she was dirty, and, looking back, it was a real low point. TFM.

That’s one hell of a story, Walter.

Having a hunger strike from not eating pussy. TFM.

The ol’ double negative. Classic.

Following girls home from the bar at a safe distance to make sure they get home safe and to find out where they live. TFM.

Interesting tactic.

Getting a hard-on by constantly touching your butthole and then smelling your fingers because you’ve done so much doggy style. TFM.

You disgust me. You disgust us all.

Dad giving you a wink after coming out of the bedroom with mom on Sunday mornings. TFM.

Sounds like your family has some serious issues.

Hot boxing the inside of ur girl’s vagina. TFM.

What is the purpose of this madness?

She asked if I was in a frat. I said, “Hell yeah.” Told me she fucks frat stars. I asked what sorority she was in. GDI. I walked the right past that girl. TFM.

You’ve got ice in your veins.

Having your safe word during rough sex be “Omaha” because the fratstar your doing looks like Brock Osweiler. TFM.

What? How do you people come up with this shit?

Giving the gay kid a bid because you are lowkey a flamer and you want someone to hangout with and get your nails done together and lick eachothers butt holes and drink mikes hard lemonade with. But then 2.5hrs into nextflix and chill u realise this homie been seeing other guys, cause his dick tastes like someone else’s asshole other than your own. So you chomp down on it and swallow, because spitters are quitters. Now he has no penis and you have relieved him of the prison that is a male body, doing him the biggest service of his entire life. You see him rejoice and it kills you inside. The only thing keeping you going is knowing that Mike’s is releasing a cum-flavoured hard lemonade in the Christmas season. You drown away your sorrows with it when it comes out. TFM.

This is it. This is the submission that finally makes me quit my job.

2cfd70585f1e6b7be6ea5a9043c3fc21-577x1024

Goodnight, Del valle.

e685b231d0c80be177b9a4caa719a5ce

There are no words.

5bf1413444ccb31990b08bbaf427500f-576x1024

Given the photo, the time stamp looks accurate.

8f094c47060077c5e0d0fb0d0ca753f3

Fisting your bros. It’s a TFM.

e749363d608fb47bd9dda02136971c7a

They may not be top house, but at least they’re the prettiest.

3e075283f0619ec1231576e6f9216242

Please, please stop doing these.

b64924c5186e33e331410266dea13638-1024x576

But at what cost?

ef67a3273915ca6fe9a9a77df3e3a711

I said STOP DOING THESE CHRISTMAS CARD PHOTOS.

99d32b640eb631287bb5a7a7cb46fcfe-577x1024

Kid’s rocking some goddamn dinner plates now.

566b46d5751ed4cfb4b026a3da9e2ffa

Santa down.

289832dab716dd40ff77b19d74a13c79

I really, really hope this is another fraternity playing a prank. Please, let it be that.

2691376eb63cb67625ac18e1d776993d

Where did his right hand go???

be916b4e2370d2842b4951edbe0d5c0f

If they didn’t get laid wearing these costumes, then I don’t know women.

2d46d14d63cd41c1e4021237a8ce283d

GOD. DAMN. IT. STOP.

eda4039acf826459ecc54e4c966c579d-577x1024

Yeah, this kid is fucked.

4505da0bfdf3bd2300f719602cce6fb4-577x1024

Only 100? I woulda guessed more.

973e0beb986864d64d6d82e8fde81f48-577x1024

Looks reeaalll productive.

0bf3ff461daefeff4bef9391f1299f91

25% Tequila, 35% bellybutton lint, 40% hair, and 100% reason to remember the name… of the fraternity house you puked at last night.

apsi

Snakehead tatoobutt goober.

ball

“Would you like a spot of tea?”

tke

NSFW.

GET THE OFFICIAL SHIRT OF FAIL FRIDAY

This week we checked out the Yeti Campus Stories app and found some extra gems. Be sure to check out Yeti if you don’t already have it. This week’s fail photos and videos we found on Yeti are below.

Screen Shot 2015-12-11 at 11.40.09 AM

Nothing More Classic Than A Terrible Lib Dub

They Should Be Sorry That Their Lip Dub Is So Bad

Chaser

Got something you think should be featured in Fail Friday? Email it to intern@totalfratmove.com.

Now watch the latest episode of Exec Board

Email this to a friend

TFM Intern

Never getting promoted.

82 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take TFM with you. Get

New Stories

Load More