Ten real submissions, five photos, and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
Jerry Sandusky turning tight ends into wide recievers. TFM. –Texas
It’s not even too soon. It’s just wrong.
Using the fact that 11/11/11 won’t come for another millennium to blackout. TFM. –Arkansas
Another millennium? Really you dumb fuck?
Going down on girls because you like the taste, not because you want to pleasure them. TFM. –Illinois
Serial killer alert.
Getting blacked out with brothers and getting Vineyard Vines, Southern Tide, Southern Point, and Southern Marsh tattoos. TFM. –Louisiana
Pictures or it didn’t happen.
After I jizzed on her head I took my thumb and wiped it away and called her SIMBA. TFM. –Nevada
You just ruined a classic piece of my childhood.
In the past 12 months our risk manager has broken both arms in a drunken gator accident, been arrested twice, gotten a DUI, broken his shoulder in a late night wrestling match at the house, and last night he got hit by a car leaving the bar. Risk Manager. TFM. –Anonymous
Sounds like he sucks dick at his job.
Masterbated in the girl’s bathroom at the library and splooged all over the toilet seat. TFTC. –Missouri
I’m fairly certain there are laws against this type of behavior.
Slam sucking off the Adderall dealer at 2:00am in exchange for my product. TFM. –Indiana
You’ve got problems, buddy. Real problems.
Letting my personal pledge use my sky miles just so I can haze him while I’m at home. TFM. –Texas
This is getting weird.
Giving a girl a Cleveland Steamer then literally fucking the shit out of her tits. TFTC. –Ohio
Let the record show this is not a TFM.
He was the first person in line to buy Modern Warfare 3 at Wal-Mart.
Our lifestyles aren’t comparable in any way.
I don’t know what’s going on here. Your guess is as good as mine.
He hearts his big.
That’s it…I’m done here.
It’s painful, but worth sitting through to know you’ll never be this guy: