Alright ma’am, place your purse up here and let me take a gander. A modestly sized Ziploc bag of weed, two marijuana infused brownies, and a pack of ganja gummies. Everything looks in order here. You’re good to go in. Hold on. Is that a Dasani in your back pocket? Ma’am, stand down. She’s on the run. Johnson, I’m going to need back up.
Surprisingly, the scene I just so eloquently painted doesn’t take place at a Bonnaroo staff security tent, rather, it’s the type of cheeky shenanigans you’ll undoubtedly see at the U.S. Open this weekend.
With marijuana legal in Washington, and this year’s US Open to be played at Chambers Bay in Tacoma, fans will be allowed to just waltz onto the course with their own supply of grass. Grass of a much more interesting variety that found on the fairways, that is.
While all spectators have to enter through manned gates and pass their belongings through metal detectors, volunteers have been advised to allow entry to people even if they are carrying a stash of marijuana with them.
Bizarrely, while fans will be able to bring drugs with them, they won’t be allowed to bring in bottles of water, which they will have to throw away at the door.
Makes sense. The venue marks up their own water bottles and with mouths running drier than the fairways at Chambers Bay, they’re set to rake in ALL the money.
Also, you have to imagine the amount of jackasses screaming “In the hole!” off the tee of a par 5 and “Mashed potatoes!” will be significantly less than years past. Those baked out of their minds will barely muster up enough energy to golf clap, let alone howl the name “Bubba.”
It is still illegal to actually light up in public in the state of Washington, so for those of you planning on puff, puff, passing and watching Phil rip one out of the trees, do so cautiously. Vapes and edibles are your friends, here..
Image via Youtube