Giving the Randy Moss when your parents ask what you want for Christmas: “Straight cash, homey.” TFM.
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“Who ordered the stripper?” when a female cop knocks on your door about a noise complaint. TFM.
Not worrying about a possible ebola outbreak, because after living in the frat house, there’s nothing your immune system can’t handle. TFM.
First one in my family not to attend an Ivy League school, also the first one in my family to have a threesome. TFM.