Former ΔΤΔ Chapter President Arrested For Nude, Drunken, Fire Extinguisher Assault

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Nice Move

Research for a cover photo for this story led me to the website for the Florida Atlantic University chapter of Delta Tau Delta, a hastily constructed webpage that is futile in depth, but golden in quality, at least as it relates to the subject of this story. The young man featured in the above photo, wearing a shameless pair of mutton chops, is our perp, Alex Fanaian.

Also on the website, Alex lists his hobbies as “just being awesome.”

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The former Delt president at FAU will soon be able to tell the tale of “When keeping it awesome goes wrong.” He had himself a hell of a Saturday night/Sunday morning, including, but not limited to: getting naked, speaking gibberish, using a fire extinguisher to spray someone, using a fire extinguisher as a battering ram to attempt to break into a house, using a fire extinguisher as a weapon.

From the Boca News Now:

According to the affidavit written by a police officer on the scene:

“I made contact with a naked Alex Fanaian, on the ground in front of the front door. Fanaian was subdued by the resident using a wire hanger that was wrapped around his wrists and upper arms.

I met with (the neighbor) who was also standing outside the front door. (The neighbor) advised that he was awaken [sic] by banging on his front door that sounded like gun shots. When (the neighbor) approached the door, he could see Fanaian outside, using a fire extinguisher to break the window next to the door. (The neighbor) opened the front door and advised Fanaian to stop. Fanaian then sprayed the neighbor with the fire extinguisher and struck the neighbor in the torso with it. The neighbor then wrestled Fanaian to the ground and used wire hangers to restrain his arms behind his back. The neighbor advised that he did not know who Fanaian was or why he was attempting to enter the residence.”

The police officer added:

“I attempted to speak with Fanaian but he was not making sensible statements.”

Never should have shaved those chops, man.

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[H/T to beer and tits] <-- awesome [via Boca News Now]

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