FIRSTpostOX Conspiracy Theories

How does he do it? What is his motive? Who is really behind FIRSTpostOX?

  1. Fraterick Southgate said:
    Oh come on, this makes it but my “How would you personally kill FIRSTpostOX?” thread doesn’t? Its like this site has something against murder…or something.

    Motion to change this to a “How would you personally kill FIRSTpostox” thread.

    Not because I have anything against firstpostox; more so because I would be highly entertained by the various ways people incorporate rusty pliers and culinary sets.

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  2. JParksCaldwell1855 said:

    Fraterick Southgate said:

    Oh come on, this makes it but my “How would you personally kill FIRSTpostOX?” thread doesn’t? Its like this site has something against murder…or something.

    Motion to change this to a “How would you personally kill FIRSTpostox” thread.

    Not because I have anything against firstpostox; more so because I would be highly entertained by the various ways people incorporate rusty pliers and culinary sets.

    i sell culinary sets……..this just got weird

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  3. Fraterick Southgate said:

    Oh come on, this makes it but my “How would you personally kill FIRSTpostOX?” thread doesn’t? Its like this site has something against murder…or something.

    Fraterick, just letting you know that you are possibly the only Pike that is funny and entertaining on here. Props.

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  4. Conspiracy Theory #1:
    FIRSTpostOX is most likely a fellow Total Frat Mover that became fed up with the amount of “firsting” all the pledges had been doing. After a long reign of “firsting” and pissing everyone off at his superb timing skills, everyone is now indignant over the overuse of the word first. I see us now trying to compete for the last word rather than the first, because as one great frat star said, “The first shall be last and the last shall be first.”

    Conspiracy Theory #2: Obama

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  5. I like to picture FIRSTpostOX in a tuxedo T-shirt. ‘Cause it says like, I wanna be formal but I’m here to party too. I like to party, so I like my FIRSTpostOX to party

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  6. He most likely wrote a java script to comment First whenever the site is updated. I’m not a coder but I know electrical engineers who could write a code like that easily.

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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  7. I used to think it was an account ran by a pledge trainer that all the pledges have access to. For every first they don’t get, they got hazed. But then I realized it was summer.

    ^ ThisTake a lapQuote • 2 years ago
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