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FOX News’ Negative “Spring Break Exposed” Report Makes Spring Break Look Fun As Shit

For as much as I assume everyone associated with FOX News drinks incredibly heavily and is involved in (multiple) sexual improprieties, they sure have a massively negative view of college spring break. Yes, I understand what their audience wants reiterated to them — conservative values, Jesus is watching, only anal before you’re married, yada yada yada; still seems pretty hypocritical to me, though. It’s like if Bill Clinton came out against the dangers of cigars (they are dangerous how you use them, Bill; just not in the same way).

Check out what FOX News’ Sean Hannity and world’s youngest looking 40-year-old Ainsley Earhardt had to say about the most wonderful time of spring semester.

My theory is that this is all just one big reverse psychology maneuver by FOX News. They know you’re going to think spring break is even more awesome after watching their report, which means you’re going to keep partaking in it, which means they’re going to have spring break content every year which they can use to continually bolster their image as the family friendly news network while all the liberal despots continue to attack conservative values by playing a recording of our president saying the word “p*ssy.” I see what you’re doing, FOXy, and I respect it. Content never sleeps.

For more spring break video, make sure to follow @tfmspringbreak on Instagram. Also, enter our 2017 spring break photo contest and win awesome prizes — details can be found here.

[via YouTube]

Image via YouTube

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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