From an emailer:
My fraternity brother, Jordan, has apparently been playing with fire again. Some crazy girl who thought she was his girlfriend got wind he was messing around with another girl. She did what I assume any other insane person would do and put these fliers (see picture) all around town.
The second photo shows how many fliers one of our fraternity brothers took down on his walk back from class.
And the pics:
Yeah so I don’t know who’s shouldering the majority of the blame here. Were they a legit monogamous couple? Were they in the awkward “what are we?” phase in a relationship? Simply friends with benefits? One-night stand? I don’t know the answers to these questions and we can’t trust Jordan’s fraternity brother to hit us with the truth. He’s going to be #TeamJordan all the way.
What I do know, however, is that whoever Jordan pissed off is making herself look at least a little crazy here. Funny? Absolutely. But also a little nuts. No matter what Jordan did, this isn’t the approach you want to take. Your reputation will be permanently inked with “the girl who put all those ass-eating fliers around campus,” and guys aren’t going to be coming around anymore. Because they’re all now terrified of you. They don’t want to get ass-eater-fliered like Jordan. Or do they…?
Jordan is a lowkey campus celeb now, by the way. He’s up in the club getting daps from strangers and people are buying him drinks and calling him “the guy from the flier who eats ass” and all that. Girls are lining up across the quad to get their asses eaten by “Jordan, the ass eater.” Like he’s probably got an ass-eating booth set up next to the psychology building and girls are taking numbers and waiting all day for it. Julia is getting humped by Jordan again, too, possibly right this second. Dude is killing it right now.
But Jordan, my man, stop eating ass..