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Girl Turns Raunchy Texts From Vandy Beta Member Into Dirtiest, Catchiest Song Of The Year

I’m always cautious not to overhype stuff like this, when every ounce of me wants to tell you that this is the most genius musical creation of a lifetime. I’ll keep it cool, though, which is the smart play because this song truly sells itself.

“There’s gonna be a party in your ass tomorrow, and my cock’s the only one that’s invited.”

That’s just one of the lines from the song that is allegedly a verbatim text message from a member of Beta Theta Pi at Vanderbilt University. He apparently sent the texts to the wrong girl, who, according to our tipster, is in the school of music at Vandy. Credit goes to GDI Productions (yes, GDI Productions) for creating this song.

And here it is:

After clearly being shot down, he responds with “Your loss. I pack heat and hang dong. If I flew the coop every time a chick begged me to walk over and pound her in the ass instead of doing my homework, I’d fail out of schoooooooooool.”

WHO TEXTS LIKE THAT?

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Dillon Cheverere

Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. He's a native Texan with a full head of hair and knows his way around a nice box of red wine. Dorn graduated (BBA) with a GPA sitting in the meaty part of the bell curve, not lagging behind, but not trying to show off, either. Golf is his game now. He's long off the tee but can't putt for shit. Email: dillon@grandex.co

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