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Head On A Swivel For These Dime Pieces Who Rob Men By Luring Them Into Thinking They’re Going To Get Laid

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“Wait, Boosh, you’re telling me women lead men on to get free stuff? Really groundbreaking journalism, asshole.” — You right now.

ZING! I get it. But we’re not talking about twenty bucks wasted on a few cranberry vodkas. We’re talking tens of thousands of dollars in expensive shit taken from right under your inflated nards. In this case, it was a wealthy businessman’s brand new $28,000 Rolex.

Here’s how it all went down.

The woman approached the 40-year-old bachelor, told him “I don’t like boys — I like men” (smooooth fucking line, btw), then asked to go back to his place, where she urged him to get drunker and drunker. Soon enough, his watch was sitting on the nightstand. Just as he was about to pass out, the robberess grabbed the bling and split. He took off after her, managed to get the license plate number of the getaway car, and told police, who arrested her soon afterwards. They didn’t find the watch, but they did find “knockout drugs” in her purse. Dude got roofied stupid and robbed blind.

Now, I know probably none of you have the cash to drop 30K on a fucking watch, and I guarantee that the women in Miami nightclubs frequented by rich dudes are far more predatory than any girl you’ll find in a college bar, but that doesn’t mean this couldn’t happen to you. I mean, that laptop on your desk is worth a decent amount (even with all the viruses), and girls love swiping paddles and flags and composites from frat guys.

I’m not saying that if a girl who’s way out of your league approaches you first and begs to buy you shots, that you are 100 percent going to be drugged and robbed (but honestly, how often does that happen?). I’m just saying make sure the bartender hands that shot directly to you.

[via YouTube]

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Alex Buscemi

AKA Boosh. Former high school back-up wide receiver. Author of two pretty successful Reddit comments. Recent grad from the University of South Carolina.

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