Columns

I Can’t Stop Watching This Video Of A Gay Man Turning Straight In Front Of His Church Congregation

Screen Shot 2014-11-11 at 2.21.05 PM

I keep watching this video over and over because it’s laugh-out-loud funny and keeps getting better each time. In it, a flamboyantly dressed “formerly” gay man stands in front of a church congregation and enthusiastically informs them that he is no longer gay, that the church has helped him shun his homosexuality, that he has been “DELIVERT” from his attraction to men, and that he’s now all about “the womens.”

He goes into detail after the reverend eagerly puts the mic in his hand:

“I ain’t gay no more! I am DELIVERT! I DON’T LIKE MENS NO MORE. I said I like WOMEN! Women women women women wome…[indiscernible – speaking in tongues].”

After closing his spiel about his new-found hetero lifestyle–including how he’ll never carry a purse or wear makeup again–he hits them with “I will love a women.” Trying to think of how a straight man would celebrate being straight, he immediately goes into this little bunny hop dance routine to honor his deliverance from homosexuality. I’m naming this dance “Delivert,” and I can’t wait to try it when I get home today because it’s straight fucking fire.

Take it in, all of it:

Boom. Cured. He ain’t gay no more.

Let’s talk about his clothes now. A gay man clearly put this ensemble together. The purple shirt, the loud, multi-layered bow tie with the matching pocket square tucked into a paisley coat–this is the design of a seasoned gay man. I bring this up because it’s funny to think about a straight man dressed by his former gay self. He’s straight now, but he still looks gay. He’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing. I wonder if he went home and was like, “Fuck these gay ass clothes!” while ripping them off and crow-hopping them across his bedroom in disgust. He probably needs a whole new wardrobe now. A straight one.

This guy is my favorite:

Screen Shot 2014-11-11 at 2.30.30 PM

“This ni**a here crazy.”

Do the Delivert if you ain’t gay no more.

Image via YouTube

Email this to a friend

Dillon Cheverere

Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. He's a native Texan with a full head of hair and knows his way around a nice box of red wine. Dorn graduated (BBA) with a GPA sitting in the meaty part of the bell curve, not lagging behind, but not trying to show off, either. Golf is his game now. He's long off the tee but can't putt for shit. Email: dillon@grandex.co

31 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take TFM with you. Get

New Stories

Load More