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If You Got A Handy In The Stands At The Bills Game Yesterday, Your New Lover Is Looking For You

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Hey, Bills fans, if you got your tally whacked yesterday at Ralph Wilson Stadium, your new lover is looking for you — and she wants to go another round.

A Craigslist post from Western New York has the details. Basically, while her boyfriend was in the bathroom, some assumably heinous Buffalo chick jerked off the face-painted guy next to her until he creamed his pants. It’s basically Buffalo’s version of Romeo and Juliet.

CLICK TO ENLARGE:

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OK, let’s breakdown and rank all the weird shit that happened at the Bills game yesterday:

4. This guy slamming his face into a parked bus after a tough round of dizzy bat.
3. A Saturday night Tailgate suicide in the parking lot of Ralph Wilson Stadium.
2. An in-stadium stranger handjob with a random face-painted dude.
1. The Bills winning a home-opener against a decent Indianapolis Colts team.

All of this stuff is completely out of the ordinary for almost any other NFL franchise (Looking at you, Jets fans).

Sure, there is a chance this is fake, but I want it to be real so bad. In the last 24 hours, I have learned more about the city of Buffalo, NY than I ever wanted to know. It is a weird, fucked up place where it snows all the time and people jerk each other off during a Bills game. I mean, it’s clearly not heaven — but it’s close.

What a time to be alive in Buffalo.

Originally posted on PostGradProblems.com

Image via YouTube

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SteveHolt

"Now that's content!" - Steve Holt. Send compliments to: steveholtgoodcontent@gmail.com

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