Iran’s Stealth Fighter is a Fake; Nobody Really Surprised

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Images were released days ago of Iran’s new Martyr-class stealth fighter both in a show room setting and in flight over the country’s snow-capped mountains. According to an Iranian news service, the Khouz, the only news service less reputable than MSNBC, the fighter is similar to American stealth aircraft such as the F-22 and F-35.

Aside from the fact that their claims were complete bullshit, several boasts made by the Iranians were proven false. The Iranian Defense Minister claimed that the aircraft was made of “high-tech materials,” could avoid radar, and has the capability to carry a variety of weapons. Analysts and aviation experts pointed out the plane lacked any rivets or bolts, and thus was most likely a large scale model made of plastic. It was also noted that the jet engines had small air intakes and no nozzles.

Then, in a move that I’m sure pissed off Iranian president Ahmadinejad, bloggers were able to point out that the photos of the plane flying over the mountains of Iran were Photoshopped. Poorly.

The photo of the aircraft flying was actually a picture of the model superimposed on a mountain background. Aside from not changing the angles, reflection, light, or shadows, the Iranians also made one other critical error in their attempt to Photoshop their way to military technical supremacy: the background they used, a picture of Iran’s Mount Damavand, was an exact copy of an image found from PickyWallpapers.com, which is probably where sad people get their screensavers and backgrounds.

As it turns out, America still has global air superiority (big surprise). Not only do we have a variety of stealth aircraft, we also have stealth drones that can be piloted by joystick here at home while it observes or kills enemy forces, all stealth like. Iran, it turns out, is still Iran.

[via The Independent]

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BlutarskyTFM

BlutarskyTFM (@BlutoGrandex) is a contributing writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems, the self-appointed Senior Military Analyst for TFM News, founder of the #YesAllMenWhoWearHawaiianShirts Movement, and, on an unrelated note, a huge fan of buffets. While by no means an athletic man, he was the four-square champion of his elementary school in 1997. When not writing poorly organized columns or cracking stupid, inappropriate jokes on Twitter, Bluto pretends to be well-read, finds excuses not to exercise, and actually has a real job.

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    The_JiffyLube_Guy

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