Johnny Football Is Spiraling Out Of Control

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Nice Move

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Johnny Manziel is like a friend getting to that “Oh fuck should we call his parents or something?” point of awkwardness where you know it’s a total fucking disaster, but what exactly can anyone do? This past weekend at Coachella, Manziel did not seem especially bothered, violating his agent’s ultimatum of “get help now,” resulting in his subsequent contract termination with super agent Drew Rosenhaus. Manziel, the Heisman Trophy winner and nightmare character in Nick Saban’s dreams, once vowed to former Browns GM Ray Farmer he would “wreck this league,” but now seems to only be intent on wrecking himself.

While in the past Manziel’s exploits have mostly been comparable to the largely innocent antics of your average friend with a seven-figure salary and nine-figure trust, things have turned decidedly more troublesome. Photographed alone in a ball pit looking noticeably disheveled, Manziel was reportedly “stumbling through VIP dancing and sweating alone.” Perhaps most startling is the drastic apparent change in Manziel’s appearance, dramatically highlighted in pictures of his day two attire showing a gaunt, pale, and seemingly 20-30 pounds lighter Manziel attending the Post Malone performance.


Manziel, perhaps in a moment of clarity, realizing who he still is, did, however, crash the Kardashian/Jenner/Disick table, reportedly pouring himself drinks from the reality stars’ bottles without so much as a “hello.” Drunkenly hijacking alcohol at the table for the most famous people there. TFM. Aside from this momentary “fun Johnny” antic, Johnny Football rivaled only Courtney Love in the competition for saddest celebrity life derailed, with both supposedly incoherent for much of the festival.

Now without representation, Manziel’s chances at a training camp invite, which will begin as early as next month, continue to dwindle, as does my hope to some day wear my #2 Browns jersey for anything more than an ironic chuckle.

Image via YouTube

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