Kim Jong-il Would Eat Lion Dick To Make Him Better At Sex

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Nice Move

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Did they do it again or did they do it again? The more I learn about this family, the more I find them fascinating and endearing. They’re like whatever the opposite of an onion is — the more layers you peel, the more awesome they get.

So it turns out Kim Jong-un’s old man used to eat lion dick to make him better in the sack, with absolutely zero science to back it up.

From the Daily Star:

Hyeong-soo, who was at North Korea’s Longevity Institute during the reign of Kim Jong-un’s father, Kim Jong-il, spoke to Daily Star Online.

He said: “Kim asked to boost his sexual performance because he believed that in order to live longer, he had to maximise it.

“So he asked diplomats and high-ranking officers to get exotic foods from overseas to help to boost sexual performance.

“For example, he ordered the sexual organs of male lions be imported for his virility and to boost his functions.”

I have a legit soft spot for these people that I can’t explain. They’re evil dictators who do terrible things to innocent people, yet I want to be friends with them. It makes no sense but I’m into it. One minute they’re chaining family members to train tracks or making their wives disappear for months on end, then the next they’re going 38 under par during a single round of golf or eating lion dick to improve sexual performance.

I can’t keep up with these people. My theory is that to be the best evil dictator you can be, you have to put out a wildcard vibe to your people. Keep your people on edge and scared for their lives and see how they respond. Which dictator are you going to respect more, the one who has good foreign relations and reads to underprivileged elementary school kids, or the one who kills his cousin with an anti-aircraft gun and eats lion cock?

Exactly.

[via Daily Star]

Image via Shutterstock

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