Mailbag: Should I Bang My Girlfriend’s Hot Mom?

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Nice Move

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Ever since the song “Stacy’s Mom” came out, I’ve had an avid desire to find a girl who’s mom was just as hot, if not hotter. I have some sick, twisted fantasy to have both of them going down on me at the same time. I know — weird, right? I’m a sick fuck. It’s great.

In today’s Mailbag, one reader, Tim, actually has that exact conundrum. Tim has himself a pretty good looking girlfriend who has an even hotter mom. Apparently, the mom has the hots for him (or so he thinks), and he wants to know if he should make his move.

Sup fuckmouth,

I’m going to give it to you straight and hard. Your boy is in a bit of a predicament and need some guidance. Since you’re a therapist, I figured you’d be a good choice to reach out to. So here’s the situation I’ve found myself in. I got a pretty hot girlfriend. She’s easily a 8-9-9 on the hot, body, personality scale. Probably the best tits in the world. We’re great and all, but this past weekend when I was hanging by the pool at her house, her mom kept giving me the look down. She’s a dime too. She’s a woman who gets finer with age. Plus the work done helps. Her flirty intentions didn’t seem to stop there either. After we had some post dinner drinks, I just kept getting this vibe that her mom wanted my cock. So my question to you is: is it a bad idea to bang my girlfriend’s mom and hope for the best? Or just not ruin it with my girl even though I don’t see a future with her?

Thanks,
Tim

After going back and forth with “Tim,” I was able to get some pictures of both his girlfriend and his girlfriend’s mom. While I can say Tim might be overselling the girlfriend, he was spot on with her mom. Think Jennifer Anniston with perkier tits.

To your question: is it a bad idea to take your girl’s mom to poundtown with reckless abandon? Absolutely it is. There’s really only two ways this can end. One is that you make your advances with the mom only to get shot down and then broken up with and you’re left hanging dry. The other is you end up making sex to her mom and then she finds out and breaks up with you. Either way, you’re getting broken up with if you attempt this and you’ll be known as a cheater to some people.

However, with all of that being said, you should absolutely, without a doubt, do it. This is one of those once in a lifetime memories that you can’t pass up. You said it yourself that you don’t see a future with your current girl, so why not go out with one last bang? There are plenty of fish in the sea for the taking, and most won’t have hot, tempting moms waiting.

Just blow the whole damn thing up. Fuck her mom on her bed, on her kitchen counter, in her shower. Hell, you should even fuck her on top of your girlfriend. That’ll turn it into one of those hot mom-daughter three-ways you only see in porn. If you decide to go this route, then you absolutely have to get back to me on what progress you made. I need all the gory details of how it went down. You’re swinging for the fences here, so anything short of a triple is disappointing in my book. You can’t attempt to bang a hot mom only to get some half-assed hand job in the front seat of your car.

The risk is well worth the reward here. You will forever be known amongst your friends, and hers, as the guy who scored a hot mom and pleasured her greatly. That’s just great PR. You’re on your way to becoming a local legend. Do it for the story.

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