My pledge brother is heart broken because his slut girlfriend of 3 years cheated on him. When I got home he was eating raw cookie dough and watching Glee. You could tell he’d been crying. So I iced his gay ass. TFM.
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When she finds out about one of your old hookups, your first thought being “what would Clinton say?” TFM.
The natural “save your drink at all costs” instinct when falling down. TFM.