Missouri State Fraternities Face Classic “Should We Recruit Or Should We Drink?” Conundrum Regarding Next Week’s Tailgate

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Nice Move

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Missouri State University fraternities face quite the dilemma at next week’s season-opening tailgate. With the first football game coming in the midst of the school’s official rush week, IFC organizations will be left to decide to forgo either a crucial day of recruiting, locking down potentials and continuing to grow their chapters, or vital mind-numbing alcohol to help them forget that they’re about to watch a team that went 1-10 last season.

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With only five home games this season, MSU students need to cherish every precious second of tailgate they can. You’re clearly not giving up an entire game day to sobriety. That’s downright insane and you’d deserve to have all your charters pulled if any of you followed through with this terroristic demand. Thankfully, I think I have a solution that everyone can get behind.

Everyone on Greek Row makes a gentleman’s agreement to halt rush during tailgate hours. Stuff your rushees into closets, power move them into being sober drivers before even getting bids, or just keep them fifty feet away under a separate tent. I don’t care what you do to these kids, just ignore their existence for a few hours while you all get liquored up.

And respect the gentleman’s agreement, guys. I don’t want anyone swooping in or vulturing any prospects under this World War I Christmas-esque truce. Just drink and enjoy the much needed break from pointless conversations with 18-year-olds for a few hours.

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