Trying to work a weekend bartender into the house budget. TFM.
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One day my two friends and I were chilling before we hit the bars, just the three of us. We got a phone call from this sorostitute’s house saying that this chick (this girl that sometimes tagged along with us on our wacky adventures so they wouldn’t be considered gay) was at her birthday party, passed out drunk and to come take her home, we then drove to her house and brought her back to Jack’s. She was really wasted and passed out, we tried to get her to come around but she wouldn’t. We decided to just play pranks on her, so we started drawing on her, stuff like “Property of M.F. Mudkipz” and “Fuck my ass” It was really funny because she had gone completely limp. Pretty much just modern-slapstick. We also did the “puppeteer” thing where you move the person’s mouth to make it look like they’re saying things. Eric started to wonder what her boobs looked like, and because she was totally not waking up we thought it was best to have a look, and man did her boobs look nice and we all squeezed them and totally felt sorry for ourselves, us being such sick fucks, but Jack actually did start to get a boner. I expected him to just go to the bathroom and kill it, but he started to do the puppeteer thing again, and instead pulled her jaw completely open and shove his junk in her mouth. “Dude wtf you’re a horrible friend to her” was Eric’s initial reaction, but then we began to understand. We sat and watched until he finally came. ON HER FACE. Jack left the room. Probably embarrassed. But no, he came in whistling with a damp rag and wiped the sap off her face. Some of it had dripped onto her boobs, so he had to take her shirt off again and wipe it off, so of course, I got hard. “Was that good?” I asked, trying to conceal my boner. Jack said it was awesome and I tried to hold back forever but my balls were already starting to ache. Just go to the bathroom and jack off, I thought. But she, with her open shirt, looked so tempting. I told them I was going to do it to her too and Eric laughed it off saying we were all going to jail, him as an accomplice. I held her jaw in an open position and went in, I couldn’t hold back any longer. I sat on her chest as I fucked her oral cavity until I pulled out and came a LOT (I mean, a LOT) on her face. “Shit, I just cleaned her face! You’re going to have to clean her up now,” said Jack. It was probably the most intense orgasm ever, because I felt as tired as shit afterward. I went to get the rag. Eric said not yet, because he wanted to do her. He finished really quickly but he was still harder than a Chinese arithmetic problem. He tried to pull her tongue out of her mouth and move it around his cock. “It’s not working. Do you think it’s morally unjust to fuck a lady while she’s asleep?” It was a tough decision…no, not really. We both agreed what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her and we helped off her jeans and panties and that he fucked the living daylights out of her. Jack and I tried desperately to get hard again. I was bored, but I finally got up (not so much, but too bad), hard enough to slide inside her. As I felt her pink wrapped around my cock, I got really hard really fast. God, out of all the cunts I’ve tapped, her’s felt by far the best. It was so fluffy and moist with Eric’s cum, like I was banging a slice of angelfood cake. About ten minutes later, I came harder than the first time. After I was finished, Jack took his turn. Afterward, we played with her pussy and tits, we cleaned her up, took her home, hit the bars and had a classic, jolly old time.
I have no remorse for the boner I popped from reading that.
too many dicks…
Make a book. You’ll make New York Times best seller… All the schmucks are doing it these days.
^^^^^ 1. You need help. 2. How the Fuck can shit like this be posted but we have to cover up nipples?
Winking to the slams as you sprinkle sugar on their drinks. TFM
So fr@ bro
That’s interesting how neat that is!
^your grammar fucking blows
Sorry, “that’s interesting how neat that is!”
Don’t you have pledges for that?
it’s called having pledges. maybe you don’t have enough people in north dakota for rush
What is a “North Dakota”?
It’s a small business Minnesota set up in the early seventies. Not a large clientele base up there, but according to SAE2 they’ve managed to turn a profit lately.
1. That’s what pledges are for.
2. Your name is fucking stupid.
During the blackout, I went to my room and jerked it twice to Beyonce.
Perfect pledge task. If they work the budget successfully, you get a bartender on the weekend. If not, you get to angrily haze the shit out of them.
I guess the pledges’ minimum wage has gone up…