North South Carolina College Offers Major in Facebook and Twitter Mastery

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Nice Move

If there’s one thing today’s college students have learned, it’s how to browse social networks while pretending to pay attention to class lectures. Now it appears that a North South Carolina school is hoping to combine productivity and procrastination in a way we’ve never seen before.

Newberry College has recently announced that it will offer a Major in Social Media, and I can only imagine what some of the required courses could be. While collegiate problems have never been particularly difficult in the grand scheme of the world, a Social Media Major is the ultimate manifestation of first world problems:

“Sorry man, I can’t go out, I have to study for my Stalking Bikini Pics 3406 exam tomorrow.”

“I can’t decide if the professor wants us to use the Earlybird filter or the Hudson filter on this picture of homemade Fettucini Alfredo.”

“Shit! I forgot to do my mandatory Foursquare check-in at class today. My attendance grade is fucked.”

“I used an apostrophe in a hashtag and lost 50 points on my final. Twitter Ettiquite 2400 is tougher than you’d think.”

While the way businesses operate is constantly changing in our modern, internet-driven world, a major in Social Media seems like a blatant waste of time and money. If you want to work in the brand new profession of Social Media Management and Marketing, perhaps the best course of action would be a business degree. You know, so future employers don’t laugh at the fact that you got college credit for optimizing your Facebook privacy settings.

Newberry College’s move is nothing more than an attempt to capitalize on the modern obsession with Social Media. Understanding how to use the internet is not a collegiate-level skill, and any useful aspects of a major in this field could easily be received from any other type of (slightly more useful) business degree.

That said, you could probably find some quality hot and stupid slams in these classes. Look out Textile and Apparel Management, your days are numbered.





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  1. -4

    I’m sorry but nothing is “frat” about Newberry College. There are 3 sororities, with Kappa Delta being the only decent letters, and those girls are all fat and ugly. Sigma is just a bunch of fat/nerdy girls and then they have Alpha xi delta who are pretty for the most part but a lot of them look like white trash. They only have 2 active frats and they’re both a bunch of losers and KA got kicked off for hazing. Why does this school of a thousand kids make this “TFM News” wall?

    ^ ThisTake a lapLog in or sign up to reply. • 4 years ago
  2. -5
    Real Clayton Bigsby

    Another Mrs. degree. Surely these classes will contain some good looking women to re-populate the country after the race war. Be on the the lookout, we need to accumulate as many women for the restoration effort as possible.

    ^ ThisTake a lapLog in or sign up to reply. • 4 years ago