Patriots: “Summer of Gronk is Over”

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Rob Gronkowski, everyone’s favorite wild-college-animal-trapped-in-a-grown-man’s-body super star athlete, has had an eventful summer, a summer that would even whet the heyday appetite of Broadway Joe Namath. He’s just doing what any other single, deep-pocketed star athlete with several jobless months would do. But now it’s time to wind it down, per the request of the New England Patriots front office.

It’s time to focus on football again. The party is over.

Gronkowski has reportedly been told to cut back on the public stunts and shirtless escapades, according to Shalise Manza Young of the Boston Globe.

“Via a league source, Gronkowski has been told by the team that his summer of Gronk, so to speak, is over,” she writes.

We all remember how Gronkowski began his offseason. This scene actually took place immediately after losing in the Super Bowl. Since he tore the club up that night, it’s been seemingly all downhill from there, and his clothing has seemingly become less and less of a priority.

He finally took it all off recently for ESPN The Magazine. Other recent notable Gronk moves include: numerous shirtless public appearances and poolside parties, porn star run-ins, Vegas nightclub dance-offs, and claiming he was going to take Tim Tebow’s virginity. I’m hoping for an early Patriots exit for the 2012 post-season. We need Gronk Offseason 2k13 to be even bigger and better.

Dillon Cheverere

Dillon Cheverere (@RogerJDorn) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. He's a native Texan with a full head of hair and knows his way around a nice box of red wine. Dorn graduated (BBA) with a GPA sitting in the meaty part of the bell curve, not lagging behind, but not trying to show off, either. Golf is his game now. He's long off the tee but can't putt for shit. Email:

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  1. -1

    Dorn, I want you to put your arms on the back of your chair, arch your back, and growl back at me like a dragon. Keep it mean.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 3 years ago