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Penn State Hockey Alum Went Full R. Kelly, Golden Showered Two Random Dudes At A Restaurant

matthew skoff penn state hockey pee

Have a year, golden showers!

Back in January, that leaked Russian Trump dossier claimed our president enjoys partaking in the occasional yellow thunderstorm. What a huge moment for urolagnia that was. Put it back on the map, on which it had recently been overshadowed by nostril sex and whatever truffle butter is. Now, former Penn State Hockey goalie Matthew Skoff is keeping the pee train flowing with a golden shower story of his own.

From Centre Daily Times:

According to State College police, Matthew Skoff, 25, of McKees Rocks, was cited for his actions. Court documents show Skoff faces a summary citation for public urination.

Skoff was accused of entering the restroom at the downtown State College restaurant Friday night and urinating on a person who was waiting in line for a urinal, the CDT reported Saturday. The man then entered an occupied stall and urinated on another person.

Skoff is a former Penn State man’s hockey player and had a 32-32-7 record as a goalie.

His hockey record may be .500, but his golden shower record is a cool 1.000. 2-for-2 baby! Can’t knock those numbers. If he keeps it up, he’ll be a first-ballot entrant into the Golden Shower Hall of Fame (located in Plover, Wisconsin).

Do we think he was tired of waiting in line and just decided to whip it out and commence leakage in protest, or do we think he was using the urinal, decided to go rogue after draining 20% into the bowl, and sprayed the remaining 80% across the Primanti Bros. (overrated, btw) bathroom and its participants? I wish I could’ve been there to find out. Not because I want to have been peed on, of course. That’d be weird. I just want to know what went down. I promise.

[via Centre Daily Times]

Image via YouTube

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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