PHOTOS: The Exclusive First Look At “Total Frat Movie”

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Grab your pledges from the hazement and give them five minutes of non-artificial light so you can force them to read this article to you, because the wait is over. Production on “Total Frat Movie” has officially wrapped. I can safely say that we didn’t spend your money on kilos and strippers or Dick Perry’s football picks, although Bacon did want to “let it ride” on the Mizzou-Indiana game. I’m really glad we talked him out of it.

Coming out in 2015, Digerati Films, in association with Grandex Productions, presents “Total Frat Movie,” starring Justin Deeley as Charlie Martin, a JI whose fraternity gets kicked off campus after it takes the rap for a rival fraternity prank gone awry. Three years later, Charlie and the remaining brothers must throw the greatest rush event to recruit a new pledge class and bring the house back to glory. With Tom Green as the university’s dean, “Total Frat Movie” is a lot like Steven Spielberg’s first wide-release feature, “Jaws,” except his film had more dead bodies and our movie has way more gratuitous nudity.

I know half of you have been waiting to see these photos because you’re actually excited for this movie and the other half has been reading so you can immediately shit all over them, but without further hesitation, here are the first official stills from “Total Frat Movie.”

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Jordan is a writer living in a small yet overpriced apartment in NYC. He can always be found in his favorite pair of topsiders, even though he doesn't own a yacht (yet). He may not always be right, but he's never wrong and he also knows that finishing an entire book doesn't prove anything. He could eat cereal for every meal, but doesn't...because you know...carbs. For angry tweets about the state of IU basketball follow him @jordangersh

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