Princeton Review Names the Top Ten Least Studious Universities

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The Princeton Review, arbitrary ranker of all things useless, has named their top ten least studious universities in the country and the list has a distinctly southern flavor. That flavor, in case you’re wondering, has a sort of smoky, papery aftertaste, as it was crafted over the flames of burning books.

Coming in at number one is the University of Alabama, ranked atop the polls in both football and apparently illiteracy as well. But to be fair, the Alabama students want to read, Nick Saban just won’t let them. Why? I don’t know, because he’s a dick? Also making an appearance is Ole Miss, a school that is not good at football, so what the fuck’s your excuse? Just kidding, I’d never leave the Grove either.

There are a few random appearances on the list as well, like the University of North Dakota. I guess their inclusion is understandable. I mean, why study when North Dakota has all that wonderful nothing to offer? The City University of New York – Baruch College, is also on the list. I literally know nothing about this school. Not only do I know nothing about this school, but I do not care to know anything about it, so I’ll just make a sweeping generalization about how the hipsters there are shunning their studies because college diplomas are so 90’s (they really are though).

The full list below:

1. University of Alabama
2. University of North Dakota
3. West Virginia University
4. City University of New York- Baruch College
5. University of Mississippi
6. University of Maryland – College Park
7. Florida State University
8. University of Iowa
9. James Madison University
10. University of Alabama – Birmingham

[Source]

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Bacon

Bacon is Director of Video Content and a Senior Writer for Total Frat Move, Rowdy Gentleman, and Post Grad Problems. He is a graduate, without honors, from the University of Missouri. His fake best-selling novel series, The Frat Romance Novel, has been self-described as a "pioneering achievement in satirical erotica." Bacon is originally from St. Louis, and currently lives in Austin, Texas. He still has not admitted to his family what he does for a living, and is prone to having wet nightmares ever since losing his virginity in a haunted house. Email: rob@grandex.co

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    • -1
      BroOLO

      ^ ^^ Studying isn’t frat. Learning is FAF. Honing what you learned and networking with people through the social skills you learned during your undergraduate fraternity life in order to land you a job, RFM.

      ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
  1. 0
    ReaganKA

    “Alabama students want to read, Nick Saban just won’t let them.” Is that a Nazi Germany reference intended to compare Hitler to Nick Saban Bacon? I also caught a “burning books” comment in there too. If so it was nicely done.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
  2. 0
    ATX0476

    I always think it is hilarious when yankees act like they make more money than anyone who ever graduated from a southern school. I can’t begin to count how many rich people I know who have SEC degrees. But, I guess that is typical for someone up north to sterotype with no real facts.. I’d be willing to bet you losers that are shitting on the south have never been to a tailgate or visit to any of these schools, and if you did, no one liked you cause you thought it’d be ok to gel your hair and wear your affliction shirt with some cargos. Please stay up in your cold, rude, liberal states.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
    • 1
      yourfavgeed

      “But, I guess that is typical for someone up north to sterotype with no real facts..and if you did, no one liked you cause you thought it’d be ok to gel your hair and wear your affliction shirt with some cargos. Please stay up in your cold, rude, liberal states.”

      You tell ‘em, Skeeter, you tell ‘em! Stereotyping’s wronger than all those lazy, good-fer-nothin black guys we hate down here hanging out at Chick-fil-A.

      ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
    • 0
      Frat_Fucken_Tastic

      I always think it is hilarious when people take shit that doesn’t fucken matter at all way too seriously and proceed to write novels about them that engage in pure hypocrisy.

      ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
  3. 0
    Henry Reardon

    If I’m not mistaken, we’re all still American and that trumps the North/South argument 100% of the time. Buy Reardon Metal

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago

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