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Snoop Dogg Should Probably Have His Voting Privileges Revoked

Jumping on the train of all the other idiot liberal celebrities who like to endorse Democratic candidates blindly, Snoop Dogg took to his Instagram account yesterday to post a picture of a truly profound comparative list of reasons he is voting for Barack Obama instead of Mitt Romney. The picture was actually the creative genius of @DragonflyJonez, who Snoop Dogg associates with. His reasons were deep rooted in reason and political savvy, as are most other celebrities who try to win a popularity vote from uninformed voters for their geed candidate of choice.

Just kidding, Snoop Dogg posted the most idiotic, asinine reasons to vote for a candidate ever. What’s that about progress? Oh, I don’t know, because clearly Obama’s supporters haven’t made any.

His reasons against Mitt Romney, titled, “Why I’m not Voting for Mitt Romney.”

1) He is a white “nigga”

WHAT!?!

2) This “muthafucka’s” name is Mitt.

…and you call yourself Dragonfly. Moving on.

3) Bitch got a dancing horse.

That also supported the U.S.A. in the Olympics, so you’re anti-patriotic, and a prick.

4) He a ho.

Unclear.

5) He looks like he says “nigga” all the time.

No, actually, you’re clearly the one who fancies that word.

6) This “muthafucka’s” name is Mitt.

…we’ve already touched base on this.

7) He always interrupts and talks over people like he’s better than them. Bitch I will beat the shit out of you.

…oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you’ve had conversations with Mitt.

8 ) He’s a Mormon but he ain’t got no hoes.

Oh, I’m sorry the future president is a man of morals and upstanding character.

9) He reminds me of every boss I’ve ever had.

He reminds you of a Taco Bell manager?

10) This “muthafucka’s” name is Mitt.

…really?

And, the reasons to vote for Obama:

1) He a black nigga.

Well that was redundant.

2) He mad cool yo.

3) That nigga look like he can fight.

Actually, he doesn’t, because he’s a passive aggressive pussy.

4) He wears a durag like me.

That’s a reason I would NOT vote for someone.

5) Michelle got a fat ass.

…and Ann Romney is a SAINT.

6) He’s BFF’s with Jay-Z.

And Romney is BFF’s with people that have accomplished something other than a record deal.

7) He’s hugged Beyonce before and sniffed her neck.

…now this is just getting creepy.

8 ) We use the same hair clippers.

And Mitt and my father went to the same barber shop. I win!

9) He smokes Newports.

I’m not commenting.

10) I seen that nigga hook before and he got a jumper.

I can’t even…

I was before, but I’m pulling for you more than ever, R Money.

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Pearls Hilton

Pearls Hilton (@PearlsHiltonTSM) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move.

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