The Morning Bump: Push It To The Limit

Mornings are hell. That is an indisputable fact. You’re tired and you’re hungover, but you have to get up and do stuff. So, you could use a little motivation. A little pick-me-up. A little morning bump, if you will. Well here you go, bitch. Get out there and suck today’s dick.

Push It To The Limit

Feed that money machine. Buy that tiger. Undo an unnecessarily creepy amount of buttons on your Hawaiian shirt. Hit the wheel and double the stakes. Commission a painter to do a massive portrait of you. The world is yours.

Rocky Telling You To Quit Being A Pussy

Listen to grandpa Rocky, you weak-minded simpleton.

A Little Bit Louder Now

Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly, pal. You’ve got this.

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Ross Bolen

Ross Bolen is the New York Times Bestselling Author of Total Frat Move, co-host of the Oysters, Clams & Cockles podcast, and co-host of the Back Door Cover podcast, a psychotic Rockets fan, fair-weather Astros fan, and sad Texans fan.

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