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Oh Weird, No One Showed Up To This Tulsa v. Central Michigan Bowl Game Being Played In Miami On A Monday

miamibeachbowl

Pictured: Every sporting event ever played at Marlins Park.

Look at that picture. There’s like a thousand people at that game and they all might just be hobos the Miami Beach Bowl rounded up from the area.

“We’ll give you each a hot dog and a beer, and let you use the showers in the visiting locker room. Just please don’t take dumps or pee anywhere but the toilets and no sex in the locker room showers.”

This might be the most unimportant bowl game I’ve ever heard of, and I’ve watched Missouri play in roughly seventeen Independence Bowls. The Miami Beach Bowl people had to know that absolutely nobody was going to travel for this. A 6-6 Central Michigan juggernaut against Tulsa, which is literally the smallest FBS school? I bet they gave away tickets to local charities and even they were like, “Thanks but no thanks. We took a poll and the children would prefer to just stay at the orphanage today.”

Between 5-7 teams qualifying for the postseason, marquee players sitting out of higher profile (but still meaningless) bowl games, and roughly a crowded grocery store’s worth of fans coming out to this useless bowl game, you’d have to hope people will start seriously getting on the bowl game contraction bandwagon. I mean, I saw this empty stadium on Twitter. I’m not watching the game. I bet its ratings aren’t much better than its attendance. I’d literally rather work than watch this football game. Work is more entertaining to me. Also the game isn’t even close.

But God bless whoever is running the Miami Beach Bowl Twitter account. They’re polishing this turd with all their might.

This the definition of thankless work. Give this person a raise.

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