“I love my country” being my only statement on the police report when the cop asked me why I was running down the street waving the Stars and Stripes at 3:00am. TFM.
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Not worrying about a possible ebola outbreak, because after living in the frat house, there’s nothing your immune system can’t handle. TFM.
First one in my family not to attend an Ivy League school, also the first one in my family to have a threesome. TFM.