Where Are All The Nudes From “The Snappening”? A Horny Guy Reports

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I reported last week that “The Snappening” was imminent. Snapchat image-saving app Snapsave was allegedly breached by a hacker who claimed to have 200,000 explicit Snaps in his possession. He warned, anonymously from a 4chan message board, that they’d be released on Sunday, October 12. That was yesterday. So where the hell are all the motherfucking nudes?

Lucky for us, at least one guy was on top of the situation, and I mean ON TOP of it. A dutiful internet sleuth, whose name I will leave omitted, took it upon himself to conduct an in-depth investigative report, and he unsolicitedly delivered his findings straight to my inbox. So, I’m sharing it with all of you.

I have great news for all you Snapchat nude distributors out there: “The Snappening” seems to have been an elaborate hoax. The email I received is below.

Hey Dorn,

I thought you might be interested in an update on the Snappening, specifically that everybody is safe. The download in question was on piratebay and had 12.6 GB of pictures and videos, it looked quite legit. Once looking through it, the lack of nudity was immediately obvious. Almost all of the pictures are of fully clothed people. There are pictures which are screenshots of instagrams, pictures that are definitely not candid of kids playing soccer, along with a few child pornography images thrown in. Many of the photos have text thrown over them to look like they were taken in snapchat, but this looks fake. I’ll attach a few pictures so you can get the idea. There are also a fuckton of repeated photos. After looking through the first 2 or 3 thousand pictures, only 2 or 3 of them might actually be legitimate snapchat photos, and they aren’t event nude. So this 100,000 nude photos thing is a bust.

Long story short, don’t worry about your dick pics. I’m just deleting the whole file, it’s not worth it.

The videos, those look more legit though.

This guy looked through two or three THOUSAND images of what he expected to be nude photographs. And he did it for us. Below is one of the images he attached (we blurred the face). The text across the image does look phony, doesn’t it?

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I read somewhere that most of Snapchat’s users are minors, so this news is good on several levels. The internet is a better place today than it was last Friday. Big ups to one of our horny readers for getting to the bottom of the situation. You can’t pervy inside journalism like this anywhere else, guys. You probably can, actually. Whatever.

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