20 Things We Do At The Fraternity House Which Are Frowned Upon At Home:

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1. Eating/drinking everything straight out of the container.

2. Blowing off all responsibility in a moment’s notice just to go drink for no reason.

3. Getting blackout drunk on Monday and destroying everything between the front door and your bed when you’re ready to crash.

4. Stealing something from another room, and then making the owner take straight shots of bottom-shelf whiskey to get it back.

5. Referring to your younger siblings and cousins as “pledges,” and making them do manual labor in order to “build character.”

6. Throwing up on or in something, and leaving it uncleaned for days until you’re ready to admit that you’re the one who threw up.

7. Wearing clothes 2 or 3 or 9 times before washing them.

8. Hitting people whose name’s you can’t even remember with a paddle to teach them lessons.

9. Leaving trash everywhere but the trash can, and expecting someone else to pick it up.

10. Making the journey from the bed to the shower completely naked.

11. Starting the “USA” chant at your brother’s little league game.

12. Calling people you live with “fucking pussies.”

13. Using duct tape or “Fast and Easy” to fix everything.

14. Drinking an unhealthy amount of alcohol and demanding someone drives you to get fast food at 3:00am.

15. Throwing things out your window just to see whether or not they will break.

16. Burning whatever breaks in your backyard.

17. Speaking at a volume that is fit for a World War II firefight.

18. Using unprescribed Adderall to be productive and get things done.

19. Turning the entire house into a 9 hole golf course.

20. Blaming everything that goes wrong on liberals or pledges.

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