23 Things You Can Say To Convince Her To Go Down On You, From A Girl

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23 Things You Can Say To Convince Her To Go Down On You, From A Girl

Convincing a girl to give you a blow job is a delicate balance, particularly if she is averse to it. If you push too hard, you’ll seem desperate. If you’re too subtle, she’s not going to catch on to what you’re looking for, particularly if you’re both partaking in some libations that may make her oblivious to the obvious. Since I am a firm believer that blow jobs make the world go ‘round, here are some tried and true lines that could help convince her to give you head:

  1. You’re on a high protein diet? It’s 50% protein, you know.
  2. It’s only 25 calories and vegan and shit. Health magazines and doctors recommend it.
  3. Giving a blow job also burns like 50 calories, so you’d come out ahead.
  4. It’s how Taylor Swift keeps her skin looking so clear.
  5. If you do it, I swear I’ll try never to ask for butt stuff again.
  6. You don’t look like the kind of girl who would be good at playing the skin flute.
  7. I don’t have a condom, and you don’t want to get pregnant, right?
  8. It’s high in Vitamin C and calcium. It’s practically like taking a vitamin.
  9. I heard that (insert name of the girl she absolutely hates) is really good at them.
  10. Some spa in NYC offers a sperm facial for $250, and I’m going to give you one for free.
  11. I shaved your initials into my pubes. Want to see?
  12. You just graduated? I’ve got a job you can do without having to interview.
  13. Studies say that men who get blow jobs are less likely to cheat. You don’t want me to cheat, right?
  14. Science also says that women who give blow jobs have more orgasms. Don’t you want more orgasms?
  15. I’ll definitely return the favor after.
  16. No, really I will. I promise I won’t fall asleep again.
  17. You’re surfing the crimson wave, and I just got new sheets.
  18. Women who go to college supposedly give better blow jobs. I need to test this, for research.
  19. I’ve been eating a lot of pineapples lately, and you’ve been craving pineapple rum.
  20. I bet you won’t give me a blow job in the bar bathroom.
  21. Want to see if it takes fewer licks to get me to cum than it would to get to the middle of a tootsie pop?
  22. If you don’t do it, the terrorists win. Don’t let the terrorists win.
  23. It looks like you are practicing something with that straw in your drink. Want give the real thing a try?

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There really did used to be 2NOTBrokeGirls, but since one of them spent all of her money on shoes and vodka, there's now just one (financially stable) J, who is too lazy to change her user name. J spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to go to graduate school, and documenting her love of all things cheese related. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @2NOTBrokeGirls on Twitter or

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