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It’s getting to the point where we can’t let Bama fans out of the house anymore. It’s not safe for anyone, whether you’re a person who would like to keep your face free from the scrotums of strangers, or even if you’re just a Goddamn tree, minding your own business and being a tree. It’s not safe for former LSU quarterback and current Titans backup Zach Mettenberger either. The quarterback was at the popular Nashville bar (and big time SEC alum hangout) Losers Most Wanted Bar & Grill this past weekend when he had the misfortune of meeting two such Bama fans.
The Tennessean spoke with the owner of Losers, who recounted the incident.
Steve Ford, owner of Losers Most Wanted Bar & Grill on Division Street, said Mettenberger did nothing to provoke another bar patron, but the 6-foot-5, 224-pound quarterback ended up getting punched in the face. He did not require medical attention.
“Here’s the truth: The guy said something about ‘Roll Tide!’ to Zach, and Zach turned around and said ‘Good luck with that,’ ” Ford said on Monday. “And the guy’s buddy then sucker-punched Zach.
Mettenberger gave the perfect blowoff response to the Bama fans: “Good luck with that,” which presumably means “Good luck with being you.” It’s a “fuck off” without all the rudeness of actually saying “fuck off.” What else is there to say? But, there’s no reasoning with Bama fans like these two. You simply have to sigh, acknowledge their existence, and pray to God they move on without deploying any poison, genitalia, or other violence. Unfortunately for Mettenberger, their Tide Pride did not feel properly satiated (does it ever?), which naturally sent them into a CRIMSON RAGE.
While the “Roll Tide” that preceded the sucker punch is funny in its typical Bama-ness, what happened next is absolutely hysterical in any context, but even more so in this one.
“I promise you that Mettenberger did not throw a punch. He didn’t do anything. The guy sucker-punched him in the eye, that’s the bottom line, and the guy that punched him started running out the door. My door guys had to chase him down.”
What is wrong with these mouth breathers?
It’s times like this I almost feel bad for the normal Alabama fans (before remembering they have enough success to never be felt sorry for). This latest incident is yet another proud moment for Alabama. It’s got all the classic Alabama fan incident elements: abrasiveness, unprovoked and unnecessary aggression, the words “Roll Tide,” almost unbelievable stupidity, cowardice, and shame.
Thankfully for the Bama fans, Mettenberger is a pretty nice guy, and will not be pressing charges.
[via The Tennessean]