Barry Switzer Never Met With Trump, Just Got A Starbucks

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I love the balls on this man.

Some of you might remember that story about ex-Dallas Cowboys and Oklahoma Sooner coach Barry Switzer getting a meeting with President-elect Trump and being named “Secretary of Offense.”

Never happened. Listen to this, though, because the real story is gold.

From Politico:

“All the media people said, ‘Coach what are you doing here,'” Switzer said in an interview. “I told them I was here to see the president like everyone else.”

Switzer said he instead went upstairs in Trump Tower, bought a coffee at Starbucks and came back downstairs.

“I told the reporters I had a great visit, and that we were going to make the wishbone great again,” he said. “I told them I was going to be Secretary of Offense and that Trump knew how to run the ball down the field.”

“Then I went back to my hotel and laughed my ass off,” he said, still laughing this week. “It went everywhere. Everyone believed it. I had all these calls, but I was just jerking people around.”

He went upstairs, bought a Starbucks, and came back down. Legendary.

Switzer went on to say he was literally walking around visiting NYC with his family and the idea to screw with the media just popped into his head. The “Secretary of Offense” thing was just what happens when you get a man with massive nuts cross the valley into full-on, glorious bullshit. And people fell for it.

He managed to fool the AP, NBC, and hundreds of other Twitter vultures. Adding the wishbone was a nice touch, too.

Once in a great while, a perfect troll is handed a golden opportunity. When you get the perfect pass, you have to run it in. Plain and simple.

Good job seizing the moment, Barry. For my two cents, maybe Trump really should give us a “Secretary of Offense.” There’s no way ISIS is prepared for the rush.

[via Politico]

Image via YouTube

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Doctor Franzia

*Not qualified to practice medicine*

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