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This past Saturday students at Colorado State University rioted after the police had the AUDACITY to turn off their shitty music and ask them to not raze a neighborhood to the ground as if they were a little drunk, Vandal army sacking a Roman cul-de-sac. Maybe Wagon Wheel was playing? Then a drunken riot would have been totally justifiable. You don’t just turn off Wagon Wheel. Even turning off the Darius Rucker version is worth at least some light felonious property damage.
Either way, Colorado State students were simply following in the footsteps of Bloomsburg University of Pennsylvania students, who a week earlier made their own casual transition from party to violent mob during their annual Block Party, because, uh, rage? The why isn’t really important; it’s the what and how that I’m interested in.
One individual is facing charges after he allegedly threw a rock the size of a typewriter at a police vehicle.
That’s one of my favorite lines in any news story. Ever. A rock the size of a typewriter? Was the person giving this report 65 years old? Also, who invited the World’s Strongest Man competitor to the party? This is a perfect example of why you don’t mix booze with ‘roid rage. One minute you’re having a good time, the next minute Whiskey Hulk is in full anarchy mode, having declared himself a warlord and all state laws void.
“Bring me a dozen women and your finest cut of lamb! I AM YOUR GOD NOW!”
Someone picked up and hurled a rock the size of a typewriter at a police car. That would easily be one of the most impressive things I’ve ever seen. At that point, if you’re the police, you pretty much have to call Animal Control and tell them to bring whatever tranquilizer darts they’d use to take down a rabid bear.
“Oh…you’d just use live bullets at that point? 10-4.”
Considering that this is an annual event, and what would seem to be otherwise a nice, happy time, I can’t help but be reminded of this:
Bloomsburg police say a large crowd of intoxicated people got disruptive on Fetterman Avenue, blocking the streets and disturbing the peace. “The crowd started chanting obscenities about police, and once one person threw beer bottles and glass at the vehicle, a snow storm effect took place.” said Chief Leo Sokoloski “There was probably a lot of kids getting out of control, and I’m a student too, and I love it, but there reaches a point where it does get out of control.” said Joseph Stefani, Bloomsburg Student That point was when the party-goers failed to respond to repeated instructions by police to leave the area, causing officers to use smoke and tear gas.
Just your standard college kid riot, other than the wildly impressive feat of strength.
Here’s a video of the crowd being tear gassed and fighting back. It’s pretty nuts.
Here’s another, from inside one of the houses.
h/t to @mark_abshire
[via NBC News]