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Chris Christie Bodies Reporter Who Tried To Ruin His Independence Day Weekend

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chris christie new jersey reporter beach sun


People hoping to visit Island Beach State Park this holiday weekend were not allowed in because of the state government shutdown Gov. Chris Christie ordered amid the state budget standoff in Trenton.

But there was one family there: Christie’s. They are using the summer beach house provided by the state for a weekend down the Shore.

At (a) news conference, Christie was asked if he got any sun Sunday.

“I didn’t,” he said. “I didn’t get any sun today.”

When later told of the photo, Brian Murray, the governor’s spokesman, said: “Yes, the governor was on the beach briefly today talking to his wife and family before heading into the office.”

“He did not get any sun,” Murray added. “He had a baseball hat on.”

Asked if this is fair, Christie said Saturday: “Run for governor, and you can have a residence there.”

Is there a bigger power move than this? First, Chris Christie shuts down all of the state’s beaches on 4th of July weekend just because he can. I’m not a New Jersey resident or anything (thank God), but let’s go ahead and assume they’re pretty pissed off about that.

But then he has the balls to casually vacation on one of those very beaches? Impressive. Had he shown this ability to not give a fuck on the campaign trail, he might have had a shot at the presidency. It takes a true leader to defy the wants and needs of his constituents while still finding time to satisfy his own, especially considering he knew he would have to publicly address his actions immediately after.

Speaking of that address: first things first, he and his publicist would like to clarify that those pictures of him relaxing? Fake news. He went outside for just a second to speak with his wife — NOT to enjoy the newly private beach at his publicly funded mansion. Also, quit asking if he got any sun; he clearly was wearing a hat, and hats make it hard to get sun, idiots! Saying that you didn’t get any sun because you were wearing a hat is the equivalent of saying you didn’t have sex with a woman because she gave you head (shouts to Monica). You’re not lying, but we both know there’s more to the story.

The crowning moment of Christie’s staycation weekend came when a reporter asked if he thought it was fair to use the beach when nobody else can. This man clapped back with an answer that absolutely bodied that poor soul.

“Run for governor, and you can have a residence there.”

What a quote. Basically, “Shut up, nerd!” He could have said something slightly more tame, like “how long have youuu been governor?,” and it would have had the same sentiment, but Christie wanted to do a proverbial dick swing. Much like how Trump can drive on the green at his own golf course, C.C. can stay at the beach behind the governor’s mansion. It’s his the state of New Jersey’s house, and he can do what he wants at it. These people complaining about it clearly grew up on participation trophies. It’s not the governor’s fault that you all act like such losers.

On a serious note, how is it even their business where Christie is flying every two seconds on his publicly funded helicopter during a state budget crisis? Leave the man alone. He is just trying to spend some quality time with his family.

Keep doing you, governor. Don’t let these snowflakes change the way you handle business.


Image via Shutterstock

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Dent is a washed up former athlete who swears he's totally over his ex-girlfriend. One of these days he'll get around to applying to a real job, but until then he'll keep pumping out lackluster articles while downing copious amounts of Natty Light.

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